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Did Catholic School Ruin You For Life?

Religion class ends, guilt lasts forever.

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    You were told that you were going to hell.
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    You were told that you were going to hell because of something relatively insignificant.
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    You remember the exact pattern of your uniform.
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    You avoid plaid clothing at all costs.
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    You received detention for not tucking in your shirt.
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    You believe the school was more concerned with your uniform than learning.
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    You're still not sure of the difference between a mortal and venial sin.
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    You're pretty sure not tucking in your shirt was a sin.
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    You wore the same pair of shoes for far too long.
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    You owned a W.W.J.D bracelet.
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    You donated all of your money for dress down days.
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    Choosing what to wear in the morning in your post-uniform life is daunting.
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    Sometimes you forget farting as loud as possible in public isn't acceptable.
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    You feel guilty when you don't go to mass.
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    Even if you haven't been to mass in years.
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    Even if you aren't sure if you believe in God.
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    You had to dress as an angel.
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    You sang in choir.
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    You weren't allowed to awkwardly grind at school dances.
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    But you did it anyway.
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    You were told to "leave room for the Holy Spirit."
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    You know you go to hell if you have premarital sex.
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    Sex Ed classes barely existed.
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    Condoms were never mentioned.
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    You graduated only knowing your own anatomy.
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    You had class with the same 30 people for about a decade.
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    You were constantly reminded how much better Jesus was at life than you.
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    You were forced to go to reconciliation.
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    Where you were never completely honest about all your sins.
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    You didn't always do your penance.
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    You took Latin.
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    You prayed to St. Anthony when you lost something.
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    Your family expects you to say grace at holiday meals.
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    You had to fullfill required community service.
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    You still write in cursive.
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    And "Jesus is always the answer."
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    Public school kids thought you were weird.
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    You got jealous whenever they got off from school for Jewish holidays.
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    And teacher conventions.
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    You still have all your class pictures.
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    And you're still best friends with some of the same people from first grade.
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    You look back on your time fondly, even though you complained constantly while you were there.
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    You generally consider yourself a good person.
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    But you still have a sneaky suspicion that you're going to hell.
 
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