22 Things All Former Social Smokers Know To Be True
Welcome to a world of social oblivion...and health.
In your mind, you used to be the Audrey Hepburn of club smoking areas, lightly puffing away.
...or forced to freeze outside, surrounded by temptation because no one wants to sit in a smoke-free zone.
When you smoked socially, you never really thought you and your mates smoked that much.
But in retrospect, you know you got through more than you liked to think.
Pubs and parties reawaken the memory of just how well a cig went with a beer or glass of wine.
But no one will be sympathetic to your plight because you weren't a real smoker in the first place.
Despite that, your friends are always trying to tempt you back to the dark side with sly ciggy offers.
And if you do ~accidentally~ give in to drunken temptation, you spend the next day riddled with unparalleled guilt.
You used to get a thrill treating yourself to the odd packet of 20, after weeks of bumming cigs off others.
But now you can buy yourself actual treats because you don't literally burn money.
You used to despise all those former smokers who banged on about the ills of smoking.
Now you itch to tell your smokey mates to jack it in.
You kinda hate yourself for how piously healthy you feel these days.
Your hair also now smells of shampoo rather than a bottomless ashtray.
But that still doesn't make up for all that smoking area banter you're missing out on.
In fact, once you stop smoking, it can feel like you're in social exile.
In socially awkward situations, you no longer have the old "Sorry, I'm going outside for a smoke" excuse.
And you can't rely on a mutual smoking habit to make new friends.
Smoking was fun but those days are done – and good riddance.
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