I get that you're excited to be expecting, people. I'm a parent myself and know how exciting it is, but this REALLY needs to be said — it's time to take the gender reveals down a notch, m'kay?
Let's be real — gender reveals have always been pretty extra, but they used to be a LOT simpler, like cutting into a cake to see if the inside was blue or pink...
...Or opening a box to see if blue or pink balloons came out.
But somewhere along the line we lost the plot. This woman is literally shooting her husband with a paintball gun.
Ready Aim FIRE!! 😆 Congrats!!! 🎉
This couple straight-up got a diver at an aquarium to make the announcement.
And this couple actually used a monster truck for their reveal.
What's that? You don't think those are SO over the top? Well, we are just getting warmed up! Peep this guy who jumped out of a plane...
This fireman and his wife who wasted a whole lot of water...
And this couple that did, well, whatever the heck this.
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Now some of the most cringe-inducing gender reveals involve sports. Everyone who does these pretty much imagines it going down like this:
Gender reveal goals 😍 (via @sydneyleroux)
But it does NOT always go down like that.
Bricking their gender reveal
Still, at least basketball dad didn't hit his damn grandfather in the face!
To be fair, the pitch was a bit high 😂 #SCNotTop10 (via @clariceguido)
Or his poor wife — and the mother of his child-to-be — in the face!
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And then, oh my, there's this boxing reveal which thankfully didn't end with them knocking each other out.
What will the little fighter be?? 🥊Congrats!! 🎉
Do you see what I'm saying, people? Gender reveals have gone too damn far. This woman made a giant piñata of herself, then had her husband burst out of its belly dressed as a baby spraying pink confetti. Get all that?
All I'm saying is that maybe you don't need to do a heavily choreographed dance routine with 10 backups dancers just to say if you're having a boy or a girl.
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Am I getting through to you yet? Things are OUT. OF. HAND. These people used a DAMN ALLIGATOR!
Yeah, the dad is an alligator handler IRL who runs an alligator farm, but still — let the alligator be, would ya?
But the worst one of all was these people's explosive gender reveal that ignited a massive wildfire in Arizona burning 47,000 acres and doing more than 8 million dollars in damage.
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So, folks, instead of shipping a wombat in from Australia to break open a Fabergé egg full of pink confetti or hiring Elon Musk to setoff blue explosives on the moon...maybe try this instead:
A gender reveal party where you and your SO go to the doctor, get an ultrasound, find out the sex, and then high-five each other.