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    21 Brand-Spanking-New Dad Jokes That Made Me Laugh So Hard

    These groans are 100% fresh.

    If you love dad jokes as much as we do, you need to check out the dad joke aficionados over at Reddit's r/DadJokes.


    Don't believe me? Here are some of the best, most groan-tastic original jokes they've come up with over the last year:

    1. "My landlord texted saying we need to meet up and talk about how high my heating bill is. I replied back, 'Sure, my door is always open.'"


    2. "I think the girl at the airline's check-in just threatened me. She looked me dead in the eye and said, 'Window or aisle?' I laughed in her face and replied, 'Window or you’ll what?'”


    3. "Did you hear the one about the dog and the tree? They had a long conversation about bark."

    ITV / STV

    4. "My dad died when we couldn't remember his blood type. As he died, he kept insisting, 'Be positive,' but it's hard without him."


    5. "The day I turned 42, my daughter walked up to me and said, 'Happy...,' and started timing on her watch. After a long silence she said, '...40-second birthday.' I was so proud."

    Facebook Watch / Via

    6. "I told my daughter, 'Go to bed, the cows are sleeping in the field.' She said, 'What's that got to do with anything?' I said, 'That means it's pasture bedtime.'"


    7. "My wife found out I was cheating on her after she found all the letters I was hiding...she got mad and said she's never playing Scrabble with me again."


    8. "I wrote down the names of all the people I hate on a piece of paper, but my roommate used it to roll up a joint. Now he’s high on the list of people I never want to talk to again."

    Absolute Radio / Via

    9. "I broke up with my girlfriend of five years because I found out she was a communist. I should have known — there were red flags everywhere."


    10. "What has five toes but isn't your foot? My foot."


    11. "I caught my son chewing on electrical cords. So I had to ground him. He’s doing better currently and now conducting himself properly."


    12. "How do you get a farm girl to marry you? First a tractor."


    13. "Did you know that 10+10 and 11+11 are the same?10+10=20 and 11+11=22."


    14. "We just bought our new dream house, and as I was showing our daughter around for the first time, she asked excitedly, 'What's upstairs!?' I chuckled and replied, 'Awwwww, sweetie...stairs don't talk!'"

    15. "I built a model of Mount Everest, and my son asked, 'Is it to scale?' I replied, 'No…it’s to look at.'"


    16. "My wife said, 'You really have no sense of direction, do you?' I said, 'Where did that come from?'”

    17. "The genie asked, 'What’s your first wish?' Steve replied, 'I wish I was rich!' The genie nodded and said, 'What’s your second wish?' Rich exclaimed, 'I want lots of money!'"


    18. "I tried to organize a professional hide-and-seek tournament, but it was a complete failure. Good players are hard to find."

    19. "I went to my doctor today and told him I was having problems with my hearing. He asked, 'Can you describe the symptoms?' I replied, 'Sure...they’re yellow, Homer’s fat, and Marge has blue hair.'”


    20. "I sat down for dinner at a restaurant, and the waiter asked me, 'Do you want to hear today’s special?' I said, 'Yes, please,' so he replied, 'No problem, sir. Today is special.'”

    21. "Humans are born with four kidneys. When they grow up, two of them become adult knees."


    To keep up with the latest and greatest dad jokes, be sure to visit r/DadJokes.

    Note: Some submissions have been lightly edited for grammar and/or clarity.

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