21 Moments That Made Parents Say "Shit!"

    You'll swear this stuff happened to you too.

    Mike Spohr
    by Mike Spohr

    BuzzFeed Staff

    We recently asked the members of BuzzFeed Community to share the moments as a parent that made them say "Shit!":

    1. "One time my husband had our toddler on his shoulders and accidentally walked her into a moving ceiling fan. (She's fine.)"

    NBC

    —Sarah Donovan, Facebook

    2. "I didn't realize my son was awake...

    ITV

    "While watching a movie, I didn't realize my son was awake. One of the characters yelled, 'Get out of my f**king car!' That's when my son piped up from around the corner, 'Mama, why isn't he getting out of her f**king car?'"

    —Jenny LeVay, Facebook

    3. "When the preacher asked — in front of the entire Sunday school class — if anyone knew how Jesus died, my daughter said 'He was shot in a drive by.'"

    BBC

    —Jess Cifizzari, Facebook

    4. "My daughter promptly marched up to them and asked..."

    NBC

    "It was November, and my 4-year-old was learning about the first Thanksgiving at preschool. We live not too far from an Amish community, and it never occurred to me she hadn't been exposed to it until we were at Target and saw several Amish ladies in the toy section. My daughter promptly marched up to them and asked, 'What's it like to be Pilgrims?'"

    —amandak4a7974022

    5. "We were at a funeral, so I gave my three-year-old my phone to keep her quiet. She dropped it and shouted "Aw shit!" in the middle of the eulogy."

    Fox

    —Amelia Schembra, Facebook

    6. "I laughed but it was embarrassing."

    Bravo

    "My husband took our 3-year-old daughter to the hotel pool while I went back to the room to use the bathroom. When I showed up at the pool later people were looking at me funny. It turns out that upon arriving my daughter very loudly announced to everyone, 'My mommy is pooping!'"

    —alisons410e3a4b1

    7. "I found my daughter 'doing her hair' with an entire tub of Vaseline. It took FOREVER to wash out."

    VH1

    —marnieb459b36807

    8. "I nearly died."

    NBC

    "We were out shopping when my 4-year-old son ran up to a lady in a powered wheelchair and asked her if she wanted to race. She was nice and raced him for a bit, but then he started asking questions and offering to help with the controls. She let him have a go and he drove her straight into a shop sign."

    —kateyloud

    9. "My first kid pooped out a whole bunch of glitter. It was pretty gross but also pretty magical. I still have no idea when or how she ate it."

    NBC

    —pinkdeedle

    10. "When the hospital let me put my baby in the car and take her home. Alone. With no instruction manual."

    Warner Bros

    —tiffanytracy

    11. "I'm so lucky there wasn't a scratch on her."

    CBS

    "I was unloading the dishwasher and forgot to put away the paring knives first. I turned from the cupboard area to pick up more dishes in time to see my eighteen-month-old holding a knife. She had the sharp side in her palm and was pretending to brush her hair."

    —myras4a8e00590

    12. "When my daughter locked my iPad for 100 hours."

    MGM

    —amc1025

    13. "My 15-month-old pushed a chair over to the counter, climbed onto it and was standing there holding the coffee pot when I walked in."

    NBC

    —kaitlinc4f7f8e0ba

    14. "When I walked into their room..."

    NBC

    "I woke up in the middle of the night to my kids laughing hysterically, so I went to check on them. When I walked into their room there was egg yolk dripping down the walls. They'd got the eggs from the refrigerator while my husband and I were asleep, and decided to have an egg throwing contest."

    —brittanyanger

    15. "My 4-year-old daughter and I were the only customers in a room of overly cologned men when she yelled, 'They stink here! This is gross!' We left pretty quickly."

    Fox

    —zeehalc

    16. "That resulted in an instant 'SHIT!'"

    TNT

    "My son found a tiny, empty snail shell outside and excitedly told me the snail's name was Samuel Jr. Before bed we were sitting on the couch when he quietly leaned over to me and said, 'Mommy, Samuel Jr. is stuck up my nose.'"

    —Jennie Baucom, Facebook

    17. "Finding out I was pregnant."

    SBS

    —katd4113a0fa3

    18. "I came around the corner to find..."

    NBC

    "I came around the corner to find my 18-month-old son standing on the dining room table with one of my ex-husband's belts in his hands. He was trying to loop it around a whirling fan blade so he could 'Go for ride.'"

    —wendyz

    19. "When my 3-year-old sister ran up to a very large man at the grocery store, lifted his shirt and raspberried his gut."

    CBS

    —r4732565ca

    20. "But later..."

    UPN

    ""One of our three cats, Bean, peed on the floor so I yelled, 'Get out, you f***ing cat!'" I didn't know my 4-year-old was listening, but later he was asked to name his cats and said 'There's The Doctor, there's Mickey and there's the f***ing cat!'"

    —ering413569269

    21. "I forgot where I put my newborn in my 1000 square foot apartment. It took me a little longer than I'm proud to admit to find her."

    Paramount

    —jordanb408ed6b06

    Responses have been edited for length and clarity.

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