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    31 Hilariously Blistering Comebacks To People Who Said Dumb Things

    If only we could all think of comebacks like these.

    1. This laugh-out-loud comeback that's impossible to hate:

    2. And this non-werewolf's comeback that hilariously destroyed this guy's logic:

    3. This comeback that invalidated any complaint about the Cleveland Indians changing their names to the Guardians:

    there are two teams named after socks. https://t.co/qjKKwSs6Vx

    Twitter: @ShawnHils

    4. This daughter's reply that left her dad in a pile of ashes on the floor:

    my daughter was wearing a flannel hoodie so I said “hey, the 90’s called” and she replied “yeah cause they couldn’t text” and godDAMMIT I’m getting really tired of my kids owning me

    Twitter: @GrantTanaka

    5. This comeback that served facts and a scalding burn to the costar of a sitcom that went off the air in 1993:

    Actually, teen pregnancy & abortion peaked in the 90s, just like Kirstie Alley. https://t.co/doLBuMAH3h

    Twitter: @MamaDoctorJones

    6. And this comeback that landed a direct hit:

    7. This funny response that'll make you go, "Actually, yeah":

    @tolstoybb That’s what happens when you send the skaters that can pass a drug test.

    Twitter: @pete_fuller_ga

    8. This comeback that's so hilarious it feels like every moment in human history was building to it:

    9. This comeback we should all save for future usage:

    Was wearing a mask while pumping gas today and a 30’s something guy pulled up behind me, got out and said “Fucking Sheep”. To which I replied “Is that what you were doing before you got here?” 😂🤣😷

    Twitter: @crwequine

    10. This comeback that basically won Scarlett Johansson's lawsuit against Disney for her:

    Disney has a theme park in Florida and it’s open. https://t.co/XB99J6nLga

    Disney/Marvel/ Twitter: @DanWilbur

    11. This delightfully sarcastic comeback that'll make you go, "The power!":

    One of my favorite things about pride month is celebrating the many achievements of the LGBTQ community, like when we collectively stole the rainbow from God https://t.co/qUz1zfFJli

    Twitter: @ChrisDStedman

    12. And this funny comeback to an equally funny comment:

    13. This retort that shows there are always two ways to look at things:

    14. This comeback that deserves a place in the dad joke hall of fame:

    15. And Wendy's, whose hottest chili could never burn anyone as badly as they burned Hooters:

    16. This hilariously real reply:

    The money you just put aside https://t.co/rAspqOLfIU

    Twitter: @Candee_Leigh

    17. And this hilariously angry pedestrian's explanation of this article, so there's no need to read it:

    18. This scalding comeback that David is going to be thinking about for a long while:

    19. And this comeback that's just plain silly:

    20. This reply from someone who Noah-s what she's talking about:

    21. This brilliant response to snotty customers that, unfortunately, only works in France:

    22. This reply to someone who can't even type "Garfield" LOL:

    23. This comeback from an old woman with no F's to give:

    male cashier cracked a joke & followed with “you should smile more” & before i could say anything the older african american woman behind me goes “PFFT hunny contrary to popular belief you don’t gotta smile for a fucking clown” & i hope her life has nothing but happiness & peace

    Twitter: @sp0okygorl

    24. And this person who turned getting called out for liking an old photo into comeback gold:

    25. This comeback that'll make you respect the honesty:

    26. Patton Oswalt's comeback skewering this ridiculous NRA tweet:

    Kinda wish so many freedom seeds weren’t flying out of anger pipes into people’s thinky coconuts and organ barrels and making their loved ones leak so much boo-hoo water out of their peep orbs. https://t.co/WAbcXnuihr

    Twitter: @pattonoswalt

    27. This response you really can't argue with:

    BECAUSE MY LAST NAME IS BEST. https://t.co/ECQXqbo7rz

    Twitter: @emilybest

    28. This comeback that's hilariously honest and on point:

    when guys are like “i’m not gonna be able to cum with a condom on” it’s like, ok, cool. sorry to hear that. i’m probably not gonna be able to cum at all, so i guess we’ll get through this together.

    Twitter: @danadonnelly

    29. This private message masterpiece:

    30. This funny comeback that's kind of heartwarming:

    31. And lastly, this comeback that only needed two words to blast this person into outer space: