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21 Mom Confessions We Know You're Totally Guilty Of

"I just threw away my kid's singing Justin Bieber Barbie and I don't even feel bad about it."

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1. Things get put off...a while:

#Momconfession I just, 2 yrs later, bought panties to replace my maternity ones. Yes, I have been wearing maternity panties...for 2 years.

2. The truth gets stretched:

#MomConfession: when I go places, I still say Kalli is 2 so she gets in for free πŸ˜‚ go on, judge me for saving $4

3. Moms are selfless, but not without vanity:

#momconfession we took two pictures at the pumpkin patch and kens smiling in the other one, but I look better in the one I posted πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ HA HA

4. Dreams of payback are real:

I can't wait until my 5 YO is a teen, solely because I want to wake him up as unnecessarily early as possible, as payback. #MomConfession

5. This is some real #momtruth:

Nothing makes you more emotionally torn than your child coughing @ 1am. "What can I do? Maybe I can just shut the door." #momconfession

6. Some confessions raise more questions than they answer:

#Momconfession, I may or may not have at one point accidentally licked my daughters shit off of my phone unknowingly..

7. Playing Barbies is NOT a treat:

#momconfession I hate playing Barbies and dolls with my kid. I HATE it. Can I go scrub the toilets instead?

8. And neither is playing Lego:

I just gave my two-year old a second popsicle before bed to avoid making another lego house #momconfession

9. Toys "disappear" sometimes:

I just threw away my kid's singing Justin Bieber Barbie and I don't even feel bad about it. #MomConfession #WhateverMan

10. Moms are sometimes β€” shh! β€” lazy:

#MomConfession : When I'm thirsty but I'm too lazy to get up I drink Keston's juice or water from his sippy cup πŸ˜‚

11. Momosas, er, mimosas are parenting aids:

My son has zero issues with me diluting his OJ with water because... he sees me add champagne to mine #momlovesmimos #momconfession #momlife

12. You wouldn't Instagram this, but...:

#MomConfession I couldn't handle any more whining so I seriously let my kids have French fries, cheetos, pickles & milk for dinner. #momlife

13. No harm, no foul:

I just dripped ice cream on my son's head and licked it off.. πŸ˜…πŸ˜‚#momconfession

14. Lying to your kids is sometimes key to survival:

I kinda hope my 4yo never learns to tell time so that I can continue to lie about it being bedtime when it's really 7pm. #momconfession

15. What happens on your time, stays on your time:

My mother in law took my kids so I could deep clean the house - I'm on social media instead!! Oops! #momconfession

16. Sometimes moms will do anything for a little escape:

Sometimes I vacuum to drown out the sound of my kids whining. #momconfession #oneofthosedays

17. Sometimes parenting is "Do as I say, not as I do":

Feel a tad bit guilty for drinking sugary Starbucks while feeding the baby apples and kale...#momconfession

18. Some moms are secretly straight-up anarchists:

I give my three year old sugary juice before dropping her off with people. #momconfession

19. Like we said, anarchists:

Sometimes when my kid is watching Dora, I totally root for Swiper. #momconfession #momlife

20. Mom brain is real:

I forget my kids names sometimes but I still know every word to Linger by the Cranberries #momconfession

21. And sometimes moms just need to throw something:

Almost broke my neck tripping over a transformer toy. Threw that thing right down the stairs to make myself feel better. #MomConfession

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