His voice has the lilting tone of a beloved grandpa telling a fascinating story by the campfire.
But it’s also full of dread and foreboding, as if Keith were secretly the long lost son of Vincent Price.
And, if we’re being totally honest, there’s something to his delivery that makes you suspect he might have a few bodies buried somewhere himself.
The man brings his distinctive delivery to social media, too, because he tweets exactly like he talks.
Keith is from Canada, which has suffered some embarrassment of late thanks to disgraced Toronto mayor Rob Ford.
Luckily for Canada, no American who knows Keith is Canadian has anything but love, appreciation, and the deepest of gratitude for our neighbors to the North.
Keith doesn't brag about this (because he's too damn cool), but he appeared as himself on the classic episode of Seinfeld, "The Trip."
He also appeared on a 1992 episode of Blossom, but no evidence of it can be found on the internet.
Keith's biggest connection to '90s sitcoms, though, is his stepson, Friends star Matthew Perry.
Has Saturday Night Live made a sketch about you? No? Didn't think so. They made one about Keith, though.
Keith may be sixty-six, but he's totally unafraid to rock a black leather jacket.
The holidays belong to Keith, who recorded the single greatest reading of the "The Night Before Christmas" EVER.
Keith's brilliance hasn't escaped the art world, either. Artist Mike Tiscareno painted this work of art of Keith as a sexy centaur at the commission of a couple Morrisonites.
It's hard to believe now, but back in high school Keith wasn't exactly Mr. Cool.
But the biggest reason Keith is so amazing?
It's because this is the reaction everyone has when they turn on Dateline and see he's the not the host.
So keep doing what you do, Keith. On behalf of the entire human race, I thank you.