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17 Ridiculous Names Real People Are Walking Around With Right Now

After reading this you'll never complain about your name again.

Everyone on this great big world has a name, and in life you meet people with beautiful names, boring names, and — most memorably — names that are downright ridiculous.

Topps

Don't feel bad for Dick — he overcame his unfortunate name and went on to be inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame!

Yesterday all-around funny person @Fred_Delicious asked his Twitter followers to share the most ridiculous names they've ever encountered IRL — and gave an example of someone he knew with a name uncomfortably close to "talcum powder."

What is the most ridiculous name you’ve ever come across in real life? I once met a kid who swore blind his friend’s dad was called Malcolm Powder

Did people have names? Oh, my yes, they had names:

1. There was the T-mobile guy with the rhyming name:

2. And this rhyming name that will make you hungry:

@Fred_Delicious Had a neighbor as a kid named Macon Bacon.

3. Speaking of names that'll make you hungry:

@thepunningman @Fred_Delicious I was once sitting in a hospital waiting area and the receptionist called out for Jan Sandwich

4. This one'll make you hungry for breadsticks:

@Fred_Delicious Recently discovered someone in my program named.... Olive Gardner

5. And this one'll (maybe?) make you crave meat:

@Fred_Delicious went to school with someone called Precious Salami

6. There was this ridiculously (or is that perfectly?) named eye doctor:

7. And this one:

@mplungjan

8. There were names that sound a tad familiar:

@Fred_Delicious When I was in my early 20’s I worked at a gas station and a man paid with his credit card so I needed to check his ID. His name was Ronald McDonald and I laughed in his face. He was not as happy as the food clown one.

9. And names that make you wonder if their parents were in on the joke:

@emmcgoobz @awkwardstickman @ednewmy @mrsbiltawulf @Fred_Delicious I once served a customer named Robin Batman. I had to hold my shit together for that one.

10. Like, YOU KNOW this woman's dad named her because her name is a literal dad joke:

@Fred_Delicious My father in law’s neighbour is called Cherry Pi. My dad’s cousin’s first name is Toggleabufnot. And I knew two brothers called Chris and Drew Peacock.

11. Ditto for this one:

@Fred_Delicious I met a Paige Turner once 🤷‍♀️

12. There's this bar patron who I pray orders pricey wine:

@Fred_Delicious Regular at my bars name is Rich Grape which is amusing because he is neither well off nor produce

13. This winter wonder:

@Fred_Delicious My husband has a friend called Robert Sleigh, he likes to be called Bob Sleigh, this is 💯% true 😀

14. This name that gives Dick Butkus a run for his money:

@Fred_Delicious I once had a weird job digitizing score sheets for a deer hunting trophy (antlers) record book and one of the record holders was a gent named Dick Masterpole. I'll never forget that.

15. And then a number of names that just sound incredibly silly:

@Fred_Delicious My bestie once sold on online course to a Mr Selvin Piebags who lived at Unicorn Lane and honestly, it was at least 7yrs ago and I still laugh

16. Like this one:

@Fred_Delicious I placed in a poetry competition in middle school and the woman who ran the competition was named Pegasus Buchanan.

17. And definitely this one:

@Fred_Delicious While working at a call center, my brother once spoke to a "Charity Hamjack."

Basically every time one of these poor people tell someone their name:

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