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    • mikes110

      Sorry, I actually take movie critiquing seriously.  “6. How the hell did Augustus’ father think this was a good idea?”
      It’s not a good idea, the scene is just letting you know that he’s a fat slob and not the sharpest tool in the shed. That was the point.   “10. Why doesn’t anyone seem to care about the fact that Augustus is being crushed to death?”
      Other than the fact that you can see Mr. Salt freaking out in the background of you hand selected gif, Augustus was never being crushed. He just got stuck because the pipe he was trapped in is specifically designed to pump the chocolate from the chocolate river, not sending obese children up into the ceiling like a Pneumatic tube at an ATM.  “11. NO, SERIOUSLY, THIS MAN IS A MURDERER!!!”
      Yeah, except the fact that NO ONE EVER DIED. They simply eliminated themselves from the tour due to their own incapability of following the rules. That’s why Wonka seems so unsympathetic. It was all part of the plan from the very beginning.  “12. Why isn’t he arrested at the end of the film?!”
      Because Mr. Wonka never committed a single crime during the films entirety. All the children on the tour at one point disobeyed Wonka’s rules, and they got themselves into sticky situations directly because of it. Besides, Wonka told all the parents where to find their little shit on their way out of the factory… And even gave them a gang of oompa loompas to help.  “16. Why isn’t anyone freaking out about this!?”
      Except that everyone in this damn scene is freaking out. “17. And why do these parents stay on the tour even though children are dying every 10 minutes??”
      Because they’re all bad people except charlie… Duh  “18. What the hell is a “bean feast”??”
      Is that a rhetorical question or was it just too obvious?  “19. Wonka never explained any of his half pieces of furniture…”
      Symbolism doesn’t need to be explained verbally. The furniture represents the emptiness of Willy Wonka. Perhaps explaining why he was looking for a new heir to the factory. “Like…what does he do with the missing half?!” He didn’t have the missing part to begin with, that’s the point of the tour. To find his missing half.  That was the point of the movie, and you missed it.

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