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22 Things You'll Remember If You Grew Up Scouse

Watch out for Aki lurking in them bushes.

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1. You thought Southport was dead posh.

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Whether you wanted to or not, every so often you'd be forced outside of Liverpool and into wool country. And Southport always seemed a tad upscale.

2. Walking past Sayers and not nipping in for a sausage roll was practically impossible.

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In the '90s, Sayers was a way of life across Merseyside. You couldn't find a better sausage roll for love nor money.

3. In school, not being a "proper Scouser" meant teasing you was fair game.

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If you hailed from Formby, St Helens, or beyond, you were considered a (bad) wool. And if you pretended to be from Liverpool by putting on the accent and generally trying to be hard as nails, you were targeted.

4. You've heard every Scouse impression in the book.

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Have you heard the one about nicking hubcaps and asking for a job while sporting a moustache and waving your hands about screaming, "Calm down, calm down"?

5. You're either Red or Blue. There was no third option.

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With Everton and Liverpool's grounds literally across the park from one another, football rivalry in Liverpool was massive. You had to choose who to align with at an early age, just so family and friends knew whether to sever ties or not.

6. But footballing rivalries are pushed aside where Hillsborough is concerned.

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It's been 26 years since the devastation of the Hillsborough disaster, and ever since that horrific day Scousers have continued to unite in the fight for justice for its 96 victims. There's an unwritten unity, respect, and understanding every Scouser grows up with.

7. And under no circumstances would you ever buy The Sun.

Ever since its slur on the Hillsborough victims, it's been virtually outlawed across Liverpool. Also referred to as The Rag, or The Scum. Simply put: If you're from Liverpool, you don't go anywhere near it.

8. Everyone, at some point, went on a day out to Knowsley Safari Park.

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Even if it was just to brag that you'd had monkeys pull off your windscreen wipers and piss on the bonnet. If you didn't visit this place as a child, you were mocked for being the only one.

9. Driving to Blackpool to "see the lights" was an annual tradition.

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You knew winter had arrived when your dad packed the family into the car to slowly drive down Blackpool's promenade and gaze at the Christmas lights lining the entire stretch. Stopping off for chips was essential afterwards.

10. As a teenager, you'd always have to leg it to get the last train home before midnight.

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Trains have never run very late in town from Central, Moorfields, or Lime Street. So if you miss the last one, you've either got to fork out for a taxi or wait around for a night bus. In truth, neither option is remotely desirable, especially when you've a Saveaway you paid for.

11. Ending a night at the Krazyhouse was non-negotiable.

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It's dirty, smelly, and with sweat dripping off the walls: You'd be mistaken for thinking The Kray is hell on earth and, to a degree, it is. But whenever you've been dragged to the three-floor themed dive, it's surprising how decent the night can turn out.

12. Lambananas are a part of Liverpool, whether you like it or not.

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When Liverpool became Capital of Culture in 2008, 125 of these odd creations – plus a giant 17-foot Superlambanana – were designed to warn of the dangers of genetic engineering, and were subsequently placed around town. Scousers have learned to live with them, but for visitors they're an annoyingly kooky talking point.

14. You'll never understand why Merseyrail don't provide loos on trains.

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Head to London, or even closer to home around the likes of Manchester, and you'll not struggle to find an on-board bog. But around Liverpool (unless you're leaving from Lime Street) you'll only get toilet-free trains.

15. A week caravanning in Wales constituted your ~big summer getaway~.

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And don't get me wrong: They were ace. Plus Wales is just around the corner, so it was an ideal holiday destination.

16. Your parents have said "It's like Blackpool illuminations in 'ere'" at least once.

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There have been plenty of phrases Scouse parents used over the years, but if you'd left the light on in the bathroom for more than a minute after leaving, you'd hear your dad bellow said phrase down the stairs, just so everyone knew someone was wasting precious electricity.

17. We've all lost a shoe on the sticky floor of The Blue Angel.

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And we've all fallen for it when our mates have told us The Raz has shut down. Really, you know it'll always reopen.

18. You'd be disowned by your parents if you slagged off The Beatles.

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Not that you would do such a thing, obviously. Our parents grew up with Beatlemania and it's been drummed into us since before we could walk that The Beatles were the equivalent of gods roaming the earth.

19. Mancs will always be your enemy.

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While not as deadly serious as it sounds, it's still important enough to matter. The rivalry between Liverpool and Manchester has dominated the neighbouring North West cities for decades.

20. Out of blind loyalty you watched Brookside.

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Brookie ran from 1982-2003. If you grew up in Liverpool during this period, you'll have watched it whether you wanted to or not. No one's come close to Jimmy Corkhill since.

21. You'll never forget the unmistakable smell of the Dock Road.

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A curious stench that can only be described as a mix of strong cheese, bacon, and peanuts.

22. And, at the end of a long day, nothing will make you feel better than a barm.

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But remember not to ask a Southener for one, because they won't know what you're on about.

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