Potential Story Lines For Another Jets Season Of HBO’s “Hard Knocks”

Gang Green owner and noted attention seeker Woody Johnson has opened the door for a sequel to the classic Jets season of “Hard Knocks.” Here’s a breakdown of what could happen if the HBO reality series does the right thing and heads back to New Jersey.

1. Tim Tebow Usurps Mark Sanchez

After a particularly long day of practice Sanchez is visited by an angel. The next day Tebow leads the offense through Wildcat drills. Sanchez is never seen again. New York collectively forgets about his existence.

2. Rex and Rob Ryan Switch Places, Nobody Notices

Neither could scheme a defense that could beat the New York Giants last year, and if you add a straight razor and a mild foot fetish, no one would be able to tell the difference.

3. Santonio Holmes’ Head Explodes

Trying his best to be a team player after last year’s meltdown, Holmes watches the 20th Tebow pass in a row crash like a dead duck at his feet. The bottled up pressure erupts, leaving Tebow with a newfound respect for science and the theory of spontaneous combustion.

4. Fireman Ed Is Hired As Full Time Motivator

Making the transition from fireman/cheerleader to a leader of men proves troublesome for Ed as he struggles to keep the players’ focus. The most enduring scene of the series occurs in the showers as Ed presses his head against a wall while quietly sobbing “J-E-T-S, Jets, Jets, Jets”.

5. Antonio Cromartie Concisely Lists Each Of His Children

Just kidding. We want to keep these in the realm of possibility.

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