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Why The Fuck Does America Have Orange Cheese?

Sweet chees-us.

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America. We need to talk. We need to talk about cheese.


"What about cheese? Cheese is great!" is what you're probably saying to yourself.

Look, cheese is fucking fantastic. You can keep it simple with a grilled cheese sandwich.

Or mac 'n' cheese if you're feeling a little fancier.

So America, please let us know why the fuck you're ruining cheese by making it so damn orange?

Cheese that orange surely can't be safe.

No cheese should ever be that bright.


Also why is “American” even a type of cheese?

And more importantly why are all the cheese-flavoured snacks nuclear orange?

Like these cheese balls that are reminiscent of the sun.

Or this instant mac 'n' cheese which just looks like hot orange juice.

And don't even get me started on the canned cheese.

America, why can't we just have nice things?

Nice, normal-coloured, cheesy things?

Guys, you can continue eating your fluorescent cheese but just know the rest of the world are judging you.