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Just 25 Really Fucking Funny Tweets About Sydney

"Fuck off back to Surry Hills with your loud print pants, and your loud print blouse, and your loud print dog."

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1.

When I see someone acting kooky and wild in Newtown, I do the thing that hurts them most by refusing to look at them.

2.

Im just about to drive from the CBD to Cronulla in peak hour so I'm going to need a Spotify playlist with at least a 3hr running time.

3.

The m10 is the reason why I run out of data on my phone every month #sydneyproblems #sydneybuses

4.

5.

Some loose unit on Foveaux street just ordered a half soy half skim latte.

6.

This barber in Surry Hills wants to charge me $43 for a beard trim!!!

7.

Standing in line for longer than 5 minutes for Messina is ridiculous. It's ice cream. Calm down. Have a panadol. Relax.

8.

Wtf no one told me Mary's in Newtown was basically a satanic cave 😐😶

9.

You need a degree to read the Sydney of City parking signs.

10.

Couldn't leave Sydney without trying to drive home and accidentally ending up on the Harbour Bridge, could I

11.

fuck you surry hills i am not paying $17 for a bowl of pho this whole suburb is FULL of soup crime

12.

Sydney trains on rainy days: humid, sweaty metal greenhouses filled with warm pressurised human breath and people wearing Arctic-grade coats

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14.

After a long day of lifting, nothing better than crossing the bridge to the north shore, safe in the knowledge the inner west is far away...

15.

Is it illegal to tweet and drive if you are stopped dead in some glorious Sydney traffic? Also is it difficult to get helicopter licences?

16.

fuck off back to surry hills with your loud print pants and your loud print blouse and your loud print dog

17.

How I literally walk through Syd CBD lol...

18.

5:30am and there is a cunt walking through newtown wrapped in a duvet.

19.

Driving through the narrow-ass lanes on Parramatta road in peak hour and having to listen to Enya to calm yourself the fuck down

20.

"next stop will be strathfield unfortunately we forgot to stop at newtown" you CUNT

21.

Chambray shirt: check! Chino shorts: check! Boat shoes: check! North Shore here I come ⛵️

22.

The weather is so terrible today in Sydney, I feel like I'm in Melbourne. #SydneyProblems

23.

HAHA OMG someone just said "no one eats vegetarian shit" a little too loud & a woman's voice immediately yells "THIS IS NEWTOWN CUNT"

24.

Marrickville...still at the cutting edge of existential angst. And graffi.

25.

surry hills is getting a sneaker bar that sells champagne fried chicken and sneakers. ugh. fuck off back to melbourne

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