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23 Secrets Supermarket Employees Won't Tell You

There's really nothing super about it.

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1. You do a lot more than just stand at a register. In fact, it's likely you've been cross-trained in multiple departments.

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2. The "find everything OK?" smile takes a great deal of effort.

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3. The gossip about interdepartmental relationships never disappoints.

"She hooked up with WHO in dairy?!"
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"She hooked up with WHO in dairy?!"

4. You've memorized your store's shitty playlist, and the words to every exciting announcement.

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"ATTENTION SHOPPERS: Land O'Lakes cheese is half off at the deli!"

5. You're only provided with two to three work shirts, which you may or may not wash weekly.

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6. Fewer things are creepier than working an overnight shift.

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7. Sundays at the supermarket are your personal hell.

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8. And going into work the week of a holiday is like preparing for battle.

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9. There are well over a thousand different produce codes, making it impossible to remember them all.

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10. You usually don't notice what customers are buying, and you really don't care.

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No need to be ashamed, kids.

11. The break room is a miserable place that reeks of the hot food bar and broken dreams.

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12. Grocery store employees are more cliquey than you'd think.

13. You have prime hiding spots to avoid unwanted encounters, because god forbid your high school crush sees you.

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14. There's a distinct scent that stays with you after you leave work.

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15. You've pretended to "check the back" for a demanding customer.

16. Sure, you can find most products in the back...stacked about 40 feet in the air, requiring a forklift.

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And sorry, no one's that important.

17. By some cruel twist of fate, you always end up needing to run to the store on your day off.

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18. You don't feel bad about skipping leg day after spending your whole shift standing.

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19. Even though you work in a place that sells food, you're still never sure what you want for dinner.

20. "Where is the organic section?" and "Why are the asparagus so thick?" are only two examples of the critical questions customers ask you.

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21. There's a lot more to you than your serious bagging skills.

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22. Any employee who's worked in the grocery biz for 10 or more years will likely treat you like peasant scum.

23. Contrary to popular belief, you don't get an employee discount.

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And if you do, it's probably only 10% anyway.

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