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1. A teeth-whitening pen if you want a brighter smile without the irritation of whitening strips that slip and slide all over your teeth. You can use each pen ~20 times and should expect your teeth to lighten four to eight shades.
2. A set of kegel weights to not only help with incontinence but also potentially make sex easier, less painful, and more enjoyable. These are especially great for people who've just given birth, though anyone can benefit from strengthening their pelvic floor muscles.
3. An eco-friendly hard water stain-remover that'll help you wipe away soap scum and residue in your shower in half the time it normally takes you to clean. It's biodegradable so the scent won't singe your nose hairs and make you gag, plus it's safe enough to use on just about anything — including shower glass, tile, granite, stainless-steel, marble, brass, and porcelain.
4. An acne patch for those days when a pimple pops up at the *worst* possible moment. Hydrocolloid, tea tree oil, and calendula oil are gentle on the skin while still drawing out fluids and pus from your pimple.
5. A bra liner so you, a sweaty person, can step outside without the dreaded under-boob sweat. I don't care the season; I. Will. Still. Sweat.
6. A Squatty Potty, because a bout of constipation shouldn't leave you down in the ~dumps~. Squatting changes the angle of your anal canal, opening it up so it's easier for things to exit.
7. A Tushy bidet attachment if you want to pamper your patootie. Not only will it help you use less TP, but it also just leaves you feeling cleaner after you go.
8. And don't forget a before-you-go toilet spray to hide any evidence. Even if you're one of those weirdly confident people who can poop in a house full of people without issue, having this in your bathroom for others can calm nervous pooers.
9. A cuticle oil that'll restore your shredded nails after a gel mani. A combination of sweet almond oil, vitamin E, and jojoba softens the cuticle and strengthens your claws so you'll be proud to show them off.
10. A soil-free AeroGarden Harvest for gardeners who are embarrassingly bad at keeping their plants alive. Good thing this hydroponic system alerts you when it's time to water and feed your plants.
11. A tonsil stone remover so you can *finally* treat the root cause of your bad breath. This tool has a built-in LED light so you can easily locate the tonsil stone. Plus it also comes with a syringe to help you wash out the pocket the tonsil stone left behind.
12. A jetted tub cleaner, because who knows when the last time you cleaned it was. (I hate to break it to you, but you're probably chillaxing in dirty water.) This cleanser is made to flush out soap scum, body oils, and those black flakes that gunk up your tub's jets.
13. An earwax removal kit if it's a little embarrassing how often you have to ask people to repeat themselves. Good thing you don't need your ears to read the 1,500+ 5-star reviews this product has garnered.
14. A Home Chef subscription to make cooking dinner fun, exciting, and easy. No more sad bowls of ramen or aimlessly walking down aisles at the grocery store waiting for dinner inspiration to hit! We're talking Instagram-worthy meals that are as affordable as they are delicious and all the ingredients you need shipped straight to your door.
15. A pumice cleaning stone for powering through tough rust, lime, and calcium streaks you have to explain to your S.O. are not poop stains — you swear! Give your tired arms a break and let this little guy scrub away discoloration with ease. This non-toxic cleaner is tough on dirt but gentle on porcelain so you can sit atop the listening throne you deserve.
16. A foot file so your heels are in sandal-ready condition. Rub gently and watch the dead skin and calluses fall like shredded cheese to reveal baby soft heels.
17. A TubShroom if your relaxing showers have turned into you standing in a puddle of water for 15 minutes because the drain is clogged...again. This little guy snags the hair you shed before it can collect in the pipes.
18. A tube of antiperspirant hand cream to dry your hands if you suffer from hyperhidrosis (excess sweating), or if you're just nervous!
19. A collagen-coating hair treatment that's safe for all hair types and will revitalize a dry, damaged, and overprocessed mane overnight.
20. An antifungal tea tree balm for treating basically any somewhat embarrassing skin condition you can think of: athlete's foot, ringworm, jock itch, and even just dry skin.
21. And a box of wart-removing pads that you apply like bandages so you can be rid of your extra growth. Be gone, appendage!
22. A tub of brightening, firming, and rejuvenating eye cream because you're tired of your mom constantly asking you, "Are you getting enough sleep?" on your weekly FaceTime even though she should darn well know that your dark circles are hereditary (thnx a lot Mom!).
23. A denture cleaner if your retainer is coated in some weird white film. These fizzing tablets will blast away odor-causing bacteria, discoloration, and plaque from your Invisalign, retainers, dentures, night guards, and more.
24. A grout paint pen to cover up the mortifyingly large amount of dirt and grime that has fallen into the cracks. It works like a regular marker, so even the people who failed art can use it. And it beats actually having to clean! 🙃
25. Some stain-removing tablets for lifting spills, set-in stains, and all the other mess you've made. Toss one in with a regular load and your whites will emerge dramatically whiter.
26. A bottle of dentist-approved mouthwash for beating swamp breath, whether it's caused by a medical issue or because you just drank coffee and orange juice. This one's made sans alcohol so it won't burn when you swish it around your mouth.
27. A natural shoe deodorizer spray so you don't have to wash your feet the minute you get home to get rid of the funk from your work flats. It's made with essential oils and smells like lemon and eucalyptus so you'll probably want to spray it around the rest of your house, too.
28. A nail repair pen because your discolored, dry, brittle fingernails and toenails aren't ready for manis and pedis just yet.
29. And a box of extra strength Gas-X chewables if you know you should avoid dairy but your Friday night plans include mac 'n' cheese, nachos, and ice cream.
30. A stainless-steel tongue scraper to banish bad bacteria and improve stinky breath. This way you won't suffer the embarrassment of someone offering you a breath mint.
31. A pack of Schick dermaplaning razors that'll evict any unwanted stray hairs and help you conquer your PTSD from accidentally shaving off half your eyebrow in middle school thanks to its precision cover. These itty bitty razors are great for stashing in your purse for touch-ups on the go.
32. A clay mask for vacuuming the gunk out of your pores. It may also help reduce the frequency of your breakouts and soften your skin.
33. A dandruff shampoo so you can banish white flakes from your scalp. It's made with ketoconazole 1%, an antifungal ingredient that'll tell your dandruff it's no longer welcome here.
34. An odor-eliminating spray because you're pretty sure your houseguests think your living room smells like cat pee (you definitely think so!) since your kitty urinates in the same corner. This'll lift stains and odors fast. Plus each spray releases bacteria that feeds on the ammonia left behind after your pet's accidents, eliminating the urine completely and deterring your pet from peeing in the same spot again.
Reviews have been edited for length and/or clarity.