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12 Minor But Still Annoying Downsides To Being A Lesbian

An airing of grievances from a wearer of flannel.

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1. In the beginning, figuring out dating and sex stuff can get a bit weird.

Unfortunately, vagatarianism isn't usually a topic in high school sex ed. Those bastards.

2. You seem to be asked an uncomfortable number of questions about your sex life.


"But really, though. Like, are you usually on top?"

3. Sometimes, your Shark Weeks don't quite match up, and you have to wait forever until sexytimes.

Double the uteruses, double the fun!


4. If you ever injure your wrist/hand/fingers, you're screwed for a while.

Yup. Stuff gets dicey.

5. That guy at the bar finds out that your girlfriend is your girlfriend and just starts hitting on both of you.

Well, this is awkward. Or at least, should have been awkward. For you. Now it's just weird. For us.

6. You inexplicably become your friends' go-to sex toy expert.

Really, though, use the Google.

7. People have very specific ideas about what you should wear.

I do love flannel, though. But that's just because it's so warm and comfy and colorful, right? Totally not because I'm gay.

8. People make weird lesbian references at you, and you feel bad when you don't understand them.

What is this about a free toaster? I'm sure I could get behind that.

9. Flirting can be like ramming your head against a very clueless, and often very straight wall. Repeatedly.

No, I don't want to know where you bought your super cute earrings. I want to kiss your face.

10. "So, who's the guy?"

Neither of us. Kind of the point.

11. It's hard to find a movie with a main character who's gay but doesn't die/go insane/kill everyone.

Looking at you, Lost and Delirious.

12. Get a fancy manicure at your own peril.

Yeah, everyone involved will.

But honestly, there's no one I'd rather be but me.

Yay for the gay!

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