1. What a fantastic way to start the day.
2. Itchy molars, anyone?
3. You know, for those really dirty baby bottoms.
4. Sugar, spice, and everything — OH GOD, WHAT HAVE I DONE?
5. I've been meaning to shave my feet...
6. My eyes are burning just thinking about this error.
7. One wrong choice and your humorous drawing of a vulgar act becomes this whiteboard's tattoo of regret.
8. Coincidentally, both are for peak performance.
9. The sacrifices one makes for anti-perspiration.
10. All of a sudden, that speck of dust on your keyboard doesn't seem so bad.
11. The two ingredients required to create one disastrous cup of hot chocolate.
12. Don't sniff glue, kids.
13. One of these might be the secret ingredient your gravy recipe needs.
14. A super challenging task when you've already had one beer too many.
15. So much for a tranquil afternoon of tea...
16. Just when you thought you couldn't make an even poorer life decision.
17. I like my vegetable broth shaken, not stirred.
18. T-minus 1 hour until the longest night of your life begins.
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