1."My human always switches food pellet brands on me, and you don't see me complaining. I just poop in his bed."
2."Did everyone forget the real meaning of Easter? It's worshipping me obv"
3."Maybe they had to cut costs because their wife delivered another litter of offspring. FOR THE SECOND TIME THIS YEAR. And somehow they're expected to come up with enough college tuition for 6 more kids."
4."At least you have the digestive system to enjoy Cadbury creme eggs. Chocolate makes my tummy go ouchie."
5."If the idea of an egg made of 'standard cocoa mix chocolate' disgusts you more than an egg made of milk chocolate, remember, both have sugary, white goop that they want us to call 'creme'."
6."Look on the bright side, if your New Year's resolution was to eat less chocolate, these new creme eggs will technically not be made of 'chocolate'."
7."I hope this means more people will buy the milk chocolate bunnies that I modelled for. Royalty checks ftw!"
8."What happened to the Cadbury creme eggs when Cadbury discontinued the original recipe?"
9."Meanwhile, nobody is making a big fuss whenever farmers change the soil that my favorite carrots usually grow in."
10."Forget all of your first world problems and watch me nibble on all of these clovers for hours"
11."AHHH I'm not answering any more questions about creme eggs. Go away!"
12."I'm secretly hoping that they also change how they portray my people in Cadbury commercials. Personally, I find it clucking insulting."