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Ten Reasons Why Having Your Wedding In Nevis Is A Bad Idea

Thinking of having your wedding in Nevis? STOP. RETHINK ON THAT. YOU ARE MAKING A MISTAKE. Here is why.

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1. Its government banned wedding cakes

Years ago, some guy choked on a wedding cake (tragic) and cakes have been banned ever since. Cakes are essential for weddings and you'll be missing out.

Years ago, some guy choked on a wedding cake (tragic) and cakes have been banned ever since. Cakes are essential for weddings and you'll be missing out.

2. The island has a serious crocodile problem

Don't want to be attacked by a crocodile on the altar? Then don't have your wedding in Nevis.

Don't want to be attacked by a crocodile on the altar? Then don't have your wedding in Nevis.

3. The prices

Weddings in Nevis are notoriously expensive. Want a DJ to play at your wedding? That'll be $50,000. Want a live band? $50,000. Want an open bar? $50,000. Want a photographer? $50,000.
Via wordpress.com

Weddings in Nevis are notoriously expensive. Want a DJ to play at your wedding? That'll be $50,000. Want a live band? $50,000. Want an open bar? $50,000. Want a photographer? $50,000.

4. The quicksand

Most Nevis weddings take place on the beach. The quicksand there camouflages right in with the regular sand. If you don't want to sink into some quicksand when you're walking down the aisle, then avoid Nevis.
Via pinterest.com

Most Nevis weddings take place on the beach. The quicksand there camouflages right in with the regular sand. If you don't want to sink into some quicksand when you're walking down the aisle, then avoid Nevis.

5. It's too cliché

A Caribbean wedding? It's been done. A lot. Instead, why not make your wedding one your family and friends will talk about for years to come? Have your wedding in a prison.
Via quickmeme.com

A Caribbean wedding? It's been done. A lot. Instead, why not make your wedding one your family and friends will talk about for years to come? Have your wedding in a prison.

6. Lack of strip clubs

Nevis has zero strip clubs. ZERO. Come on. Are you kidding me?

Nevis has zero strip clubs. ZERO. Come on. Are you kidding me?

7. Rampant wedding crashers

Word in Nevis spreads around fast. Once one person on that island knows, pretty much everyone knows. Think "High school. Parents out of town. House party. You invited 12 people. Your whole class shows up. You don't know 75% of these people. Party gets out of hand. Cops show up. You get arrested. You cry. Your parents come bail you out." situation here. How many people did you invite to your wedding? About 30? Be prepared for 500.
Via site2.close-upfilm.com

Word in Nevis spreads around fast. Once one person on that island knows, pretty much everyone knows. Think "High school. Parents out of town. House party. You invited 12 people. Your whole class shows up. You don't know 75% of these people. Party gets out of hand. Cops show up. You get arrested. You cry. Your parents come bail you out." situation here. How many people did you invite to your wedding? About 30? Be prepared for 500.

8. It's too far away

Traveling is such a pain. Flying especially. TSA and all that, ugh. Don't want to deal with any of it. Again, to skip the flying, may I suggest having your wedding at your local prison instead?
Via thebostoncalendar.com

Traveling is such a pain. Flying especially. TSA and all that, ugh. Don't want to deal with any of it. Again, to skip the flying, may I suggest having your wedding at your local prison instead?

9. Pirates

Ever see Pirates Of The Caribbean? Why put yourself at risk and go anywhere near that whole situation?
Via ilarge.lisimg.com

Ever see Pirates Of The Caribbean? Why put yourself at risk and go anywhere near that whole situation?

10. There are just so many better places to have a wedding

Prison wedding. Do it.
Joe Raedle / Getty Images / Via wordpress.com

Prison wedding. Do it.

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