7 Steps To The Coolest Party Ever

Microsoft’s launching Windows 8 on Friday. This is how it tried to launch its last major operating system: RAGING HOUSE PARTIES. Seriously.

1. Use Microsoft Paint to draw on your friends’ faces

2. Videochat the person next to you

3. Ask your friends to DVR shows for you

4. Insult your friends’ ability to use their old computers

5. Passive aggressively force your friends to help DJ your party

6. Make your friends talk to your computer

7. Tell them to get off your computer after inviting them over to use it

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