Quiz

BuzzFeed Staff

BuzzFeed

Which Martha Stewart Are You?

You’re young, you’re beautiful, and you have no idea about the billion-dollar empire that’s in your future. Poor naive fashion model Martha. Don’t worry about what’s on the horizon, just smile and enjoy the ride!

Fashion Model Martha

You’re the perfect housewife (or househusband), and you’re pretty much unstoppable in the kitchen and around the house. You cook, you bake, you arrange fresh flowers into gorgeous bouquets, and you’ve never met a fitted sheet you couldn’t tame.

Perfect Housewife Martha

It wasn’t too long ago you were baking pies for a catering business that you had with an old friend. But you left her ass in the dust and have landed your first big deal with Kmart. Now’s your moment. You’re hot and business is booming!

Professional Homemaker Martha

You’re an in-demand television personality. When you’re not interviewing celebrity guests on your own popular daytime show, you’re making appearances on everything from _Good Morning America_ to _The Tonight Show_. Just make sure you wash all of that stage makeup off before you to go to bed!

TV Personality Martha

Not only are you a badass editrix, but you’re also a regular cover girl. You always look glamorous, obvi. You’re on the cover of your magazine every month and you’ve got to look your best if you want copies to sell!

Omnipotent Omnimedia Martha

You’ve pretty much dedicated your entire life to building your empire, and you have no regrets. So what if you’re lonely at night? Buy yourself a new fur to keep warm, and if you get depressed then just remember: You’re a fucking billionaire!

Cutthroat Corporate Martha

You’re paying your debt to society? So what? You’ve made friends, and have established yourself among the prison elite. How? Well, naturally you shanked some big bitch in front of everyone. Now prison is pretty much as easy as baking blueberry scones.

Cell Block Martha

You’re one of the baddest bitches of them all. You’re Master Roaster Martha and you put everyone to shame. You like the occasional three-way and smoke joints like they’re going out of style. Always stay this awesome.

Master Roaster Martha

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Which Martha Stewart Are You?

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