1.
"It happens to a lot of guys" - girl on Hanukkah to a guy who can't make his oil last 8 days
2.
Christmas movies rebooted as Hanukkah movies: -Home Shalom -A Christmas Carole King -It's a Wonderful Life When You Call Your Mother
3.
I feel like I understand now why Chanukah happens when it does. We could all use a little light right now. And fried stuff.
4.
Think how much more exciting "Dreidel, Dreidel, Dreidel" would be if they'd written it after the dreidel was dry & ready.
5.
Happy Hanukkah
6.
My Thanksgiving/Hanukkah miracle will be if one day's supply of alcohol gets me through 8 days with my family.
7.
Dads: I know you said you only want a little, but I got you a latke!
8.
iTunes has a "Hanukkah Essentials" playlist. It's a bottle of wine.
9.
There's no place in retail lonelier than the Hanukkah shelf at a See's Candies in Utah.
10.
Idea for Disney song: Hakuna ma Hanukkah.
11.
To educate us on our Jewish heritage, my dad has cooked latkes tonight. So far I've learned breakfast for dinner is AWESOME.
12.
My phone has been at ten percent battery life for the last four hours. This is the new Hanukkah.
13.
Hanukkah is a corporate conspiracy invented by the Jewish arts & crafts lobby to sell more dreidels.
14.
What's cool about words like Chanukah is that u can spell them however you want, changing it up for when your tweet has too many characters.
15.
People complain that there aren't enough Hanukkah songs, but "I Saw Mommy Kissing the Mezuzah" just isn't very catchy!
16.
Step aside, whiny Christians. It's our time to bring the funk. #starbucks #chanukah
17.
Last night Chanukah. Goodbye doughnuts. Hello gym
18.
Whether we celebrate Chanukah, Christmas or Kwanzaa I think we can all agree that quality family time is a disaster
19.
If I start now, I should have all the wax scraped off the menorah in time for next Hanukkah.