go to content

19 Tweets About Wine That Will Make You Laugh Out Loud

“How do you get a red wine stain off a baby?”

Posted on

1.

The most expensive part of buying #Adele25 is all the wine you have to drink.

2.

If cats could drink wine I'd never feel alone.

3.

budgeting tip buy all of your bedding in the same color as the wine you drink in bed

4.

When I need to bring a bottle of wine to a dinner party I always Zillow that person's house first so I know how much to spend.

5.

My favorite chicken is made with white wine and no chicken.

6.

How to drink wine: 1. Get glass. 2. Open wine bottle. 3. Throw glass in garbage. (you don't need that) 4. Drink whole bottle. 5. Repeat.

7.

You can't make anyone shut up, but you can drink a bottle of wine and forget everything they said

8.

How do you get a red wine stain off a baby?

9.

After dozens of rewrites, all tales of Jesus' brother Carl were lost from the Bible. Carl could turn wine into water. No one liked Carl.

10.

I always drink a few glasses of wine before going to the gym so I can ignore the burn

11.

It never fails- every time I wear white, I spill a whole bottle of wine down my throat.

12.

lets be honest. we both know i only put this im my basket to stop the wine bottles from clinking.

13.

Coffee, you're out. Wine, get on deck.

14.

My favorite Sunday game is going to the store and filling up a handbasket with wine. When it's too heavy to carry, you win. I never lose.

15.

I'm sorry for pouring red wine into your Brita, I just was trying to make rosé.

16.

No good can ever come from the BevMo five cent wine sale

17.

Reaching new heights in laziness by choosing wine based on screw-top vs. cork

18.

So much of being an adult is bringing a bottle of wine someone brought to your house to someone else's house

19.

My hotel has a temper pedic mattress. Guess who's not spilling her box of red wine tonight!

Every. Tasty. Video. EVER. The new Tasty app is here!

Dismiss