It's here: We've arrived at the final stressful/delightful recap of this season of The Great British Bake Off!
This week, finalists Chigs, Crystelle, and Giuseppe battled for victory, for glory, and most importantly, for an engraved decorative plate. For the last time in 2021, here are 19 utterly delightful moments from the episode and nine unspeakably stressful ones.
Warning: Spoilers (and potential emotional turmoil) ahead.
1. DELIGHTFUL: The show forgoing the opening skit in favor of a montage of the season, led by this truly cinematic image of the tent awaiting the finalists in the morning mist. I'm assuming they only did this because they ran out of their costume budget or Paul had a bad reaction to that green Hulk paint from a few episodes back.
2. DELIGHTFUL: Learning, via Noel's narration, that this is the first final ever where all three bakers have earned two Hollywood Handshakes and been Star Baker twice.
Signature Challenge: Carrot Cake
3. DELIGHTFUL: Paul saying this.
4. DELIGHTFUL: These jaunty "it's the final!" banners.
5. STRESSFUL: Prue having this frankly terrifying reaction when Chigs tells her just how much he's making carrot the hero of his cake.
6. DELIGHTFUL: Chigs' family wishing him luck before the final via an iPad. They can't do it in person, since the show is still operating in a pandemic "bubble," and none of the contestants have seen their families for two months.
During this segment, Chigs shares how the loss of his father at an early age shaped his personal philosophy of trying new things and trying them now.
7. DELIGHTFUL: Giuseppe receiving a good-luck message from his father, who inspired him to become a baker through the elaborate desserts he would prepare for Sunday family lunches during Giuseppe's childhood.
Giuseppe's father even tells his son that he's a better baker than he ever was, which Giuseppe immediately denies, pointing out that his father's bakes in his heyday were absolutely Showstopper-worthy.
8. DELIGHTFUL: Crystelle receiving a good-luck message from her family, who pushed her to apply to be on the show, even though Crystelle didn't think there was any chance she'd make it.
9. STRESSFUL: Giuseppe running out of time and being forced to cut a still-steaming cake, which causes a near-violent amount of crumbling.
10. DELIGHTFUL: Giuseppe looking at his cake and seeing his own mortality staring back at him.
11. STRESSFUL (BUT IN A NARRATIVELY EXCITING WAY): All the bakers are about equally matched following the Signature. Crystelle made a cake that the judges thought tasted great but looked mediocre...
...and Chigs made one that delivered on appearances but was texturally wrong due to an overabundance of carrot in the batter...
...and the texture of Giuseppe's cake was off too, since it was so warm when he decorated it that it absorbed the icing and became too soft, though again, the judges liked the look of it. At this point, it's anyone's game. Or, as Chigs put it, "Nobody smashed it. ... So, it's not a tragedy. It's not finished."
Technical Challenge: Belgian Buns
12. STRESSFUL: The fact that the bakers are only given two, count 'em, two instructions, and one of them is "make Belgian buns." What the hell is a Belgian bun? Belgium, explain yourself.
13. STRESSFUL: Giuseppe revealing at this key moment that he's been living a blissfully curd-less existence thus far.
14. DELIGHTFUL: Giuseppe giving his oven the space it needs to work.
15. STRESSFUL: Alas, that distance results in some overdone buns.
16. DELIGHTFUL: How the hell did Crystelle pull this off? What sort of baking magic allowed her to take two instructions and turn them into this? The judges are restrained in their praise, but c'mon, these are Belgian buns if I've ever seen them! (I have never seen Belgian buns. Are they a thing? They look like cinnamon rolls that have lost their lust for life.)
17. STRESSFUL: Giuseppe placing last for his burnt buns. Even worse, the judges think they are otherwise perfect, just "massively over-baked."
18. DELIGHTFUL: Crystelle placing first in the Technical for the first time all season! Honestly, the fact that she figured this one out makes me think that she should be the next queen. Is that how monarchies work?
Showstopper Challenge: A Mad Hatter's Tea Party Display, Showcasing Both Sweet and Savory Flavors, and At Least Four Different Baking Disciplines
19. STRESSFUL: When all of Matt and Noel's narration set up the fact that timing your bakes was crucial to this challenge, and then Giuseppe discovered a cold oven when he went to bake his first batch of muffins. (He didn't forget to turn it on, he just didn't close the door properly, so it stayed cold.)
Such was his stress, he started talking to himself in Italian.
20. DELIGHTFUL: Chigs shouting out the Jürgen-ator, aka Jürgy Pops, for teaching him a new baking technique.
21. DELIGHTFUL: Watching all the bakers, in the midst of one of the most stressful moments of their lives, react to a sketch comic trying to get them to kiss a spatula on national television.
22. DELIGHTFUL: Something about hearing the crew applaud the contestants after they're done with the final Showstopper and seeing the contestants themselves embrace in a big group hug always reminds me of why this show became a hit in the first place.
23. DELIGHTFUL: And now, my friends, it's time for some old-fashioned Showstopper appreciation. First up is Giuseppe.
The judges think his choux buns are too small and soft, but they otherwise rave about Giuseppe's Showstopper and single out his chocolate and hazelnut bread (that's the top of the mushroom) and the panna cotta (in those "Drink Me" bottles) as particularly delicious.
Also, this transition from pure anxiety to unadulterated joy that Giuseppe experienced while watching Paul and Prue dig into the panna cotta is this show in a nutshell.
24. DELIGHTFUL: Next up, we've got Chigs — who, despite the fact that he's been baking for about 20 minutes, delivered this masterpiece.
The judges find very, very little to critique here. They adore the orange sponge of the Cheshire Cat cake and love the way the playing card biscuits both look and taste. Paul's only point of contention is that he can't taste the elderflower or the black pepper in the biscuit's filling, but he still thinks it's delicious.
25. DELIGHTFUL: Last but not least, Crystelle. As expected, her Showstopper is nothing short of a marvel.
Paul and Prue rave about her mushroom nankhatai biscuits, her chai sunflower sponges, and her curry-filled top hats.
26. STRESSFUL: ...But, for unclear reasons, Crystelle's focaccia came out of the oven 100% raw. Prue tells her it's not recognizable as focaccia, and Paul says it's inedible. Crystelle is crushed. I am crushed. Presumably, all of Great Britain is crushed. I never thought I'd say it, but now I have a vendetta against focaccia. No one explains outright why it went so wrong, but the episode's editing makes a meal out of how much oil Crystelle used to prove, soak, and bake her focaccia dough, so maybe that's the culprit.
Final Results
27. DELIGHTFUL: The show's traditional final picnic, which in lieu of inviting bakers and their families instead celebrated the staff who helped the contestants, hosts, and judges survive two months in a bubble.
Okay, this is it...drumroll please...don't be distracted by this posh bunny that was lingering on the edges of the picnic...I just wanted to include a photo of him but couldn't find the right moment besides this one...here we go...
28. DELIGHTFUL: GIUSEPPE WINS! FOLKS, OUR FAVORITE ENGINEERING PIZZA MAKER HOME BAKER HAS BROUGHT IT HOME FOR ITALY! AND IF THAT WASN'T ENOUGH, HE'S ALSO THE FIRST ITALIAN WINNER OF THE SHOW! BRAVO!
Special shoutout to Chigs and Crystelle who, in the grand Bake Off tradition, are as happy for Giuseppe as they would've been for themselves.
Look at him! Living the dream!
BONUS SECTION: Where are they now?
Naturally, Freya and Lizzie went on a cross-country road trip to meet up with all their Bake Off pals.
They met with their fellow bakers all across the country...
...culminating in a huge reunion picnic...
...where, blessedly, Jürgen and his son broke out the trombones.
But where is Giuseppe, you may ask? Well, after conquering Britain's greatest challenge, he moved back to Italy to work in Milan.
The note the show leaves us on is this one: Giuseppe and his father, who had been his inspiration throughout the competition, are writing a cookbook together. Either it's published in English or I'm learning Italian, because I'm not not going to buy that the moment it lands on the shelves.
And that, my friends, was 2021's edition of The Great British Bake Off. It's been an absolute pleasure sharing this show with all of you, and it remains a bright spot in ever more complicated times. I've been recapping the show all season, but I'd love to hear your thoughts in the comments. Favorite moments? Most surprising eliminations? Has the Hollywood Handshake overstayed its welcome? You tell me.
