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"The Great British Bake Off" Has A Celebrity Edition, And These 27 Moments Prove It's The Absolute Best

"Started making it. Had a breakdown. Bon appétit."

Out of everything the British have contributed to pop culture — Sherlock Holmes, the Beatles, the opportunity for the rest of the world to unite for a brief moment to acknowledge that the beans on toast thing is a little weird — The Great British Bake Off* may be one of my favorites.

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*It's called The Great British Baking Show in the United States due to the fact that Pillsbury already owns the copyright for "Bake Off." 

Like any good franchise, it has generated spinoffs, including The Great Celebrity Bake Off, wherein famous people who are excellent at other things (acting, comedy, and athletics, to name a few) publicly fail at baking for charity. It is perfect.

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Since 2018, Celebrity Bake Off has benefitted Stand Up To Cancer

Here's a carefully curated selection of 27 Celebrity Bake Off moments that embody what it means to be chaotic good.

Tragically, the celebrity edition of Bake Off can't be found on American Netflix (with the exception of the episode featuring the cast of Derry Girls, which can be found in Season 3 of the Holidays edition). But fear not! There are many, many, many YouTube clips out there

1. When comedian Russell Brand immediately established that being on the show is Serious Business™.

Russell Brand calls the tent "divinity, in a marquee"
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May we all have as philosophical an approach to life as Russell Brand does to tents.

2. When comedian James Acaster opened the oven to check on his flapjacks and discovered nothing but the void.

James Acaster has a breakdown after realizing his flapjacks are still liquid
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I had to look up what "flapjack" means in Great Britain and I was dismayed to learn it's not a bunch of pancake batter baked in a cake tin (it's actually a type of biscuit made from oats and syrup). 

3. When the aforementioned flapjack crisis resulted in one of the most iconic Bake Off quotes to date.

James says: Started making it. Had a breakdown. Bon appetit.
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Hemingway may have written a novel in six words, but Acaster summed up the artistic process in eight. 

4. When actor James McAvoy hatched a cunning plan to get a member of the crew to explain to him why his dough was so damp.

James McAvoy says he's going to say "it feels a bit wet" until the production team tells him how to fix it
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No one took the bait, and the Bit Wet Mystery remains unsolved to this day. 

5. When Russell tried to remind the judges why they were all there, but Prue held her ground on the subject of his oddly colored, overcooked brownies.

Brand asks how they're going to find a cure for cancer while they're worrying about icing sugar
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Paul gets all the credit for his steely gaze, but Prue is just as stone cold for not letting anything stand between her and the chance to tell a famous comedian that his soccer brownies suck. 

6. When Star Wars actor Daisy Ridley got technical while describing her methods to Paul.

Paul tells a disbelieving Daisy that she overmixed her cake
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If you're wondering why Daisy made a cake shaped like a toilet, the challenge was themed around "bugbears" (which, as far as I can tell, are like pet peeves but cuter? Maybe?). Hers is people leaving the toilet seat up. 

7. When Queer Eye style expert Tan France turned the tables on Paul and roasted him while he was standing right there.

Tan insults Paul's dress sense
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Somehow seeing Tan without the rest of the Fab Five feels wrong. But he is the only Brit amongst them, so he's probably the one who's most prepared to bake in a field, which is how I assume British children spend their summers. 

8. When comedian Tom Allen saw an opportunity and didn't hesitate to seize it.

Paul says "nice crack" after cutting into shortbread, to which Tom responds "thank you, but what do you think about the shortbread?"
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Along with camaraderie and a collective fear of any dessert that involves keeping ice cream frozen, the tent's number one export is innuendo. 

9. When YouTuber KSI could do nothing but hopelessly watch as approximately 90% of his bake leaked onto the counter.

KSI admits flipping the pie might've been a bad idea, and then falls to his knees and covers his face
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The five stages of grief have nothing on the three stages of pie-making (confidence, horror, weeping on your knees). 

10. When Russell pitched an exceptionally personal showstopper to the judges and Prue, as per usual, was unfazed.

Russell pitches his showstopper, which is based on the birth of his second daughter, and Prue responds, "so you've got this great big vagina"
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"Reality, But As A Biscuit" is the title of my upcoming one-woman show. 

11. And when he presented the final creation to the judges with a heartfelt speech about the nature of life and also vaginas.

Russell presents his biscuit model of his wife giving birth
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Prue went on to describe the biscuits as "fantastically good," a reaction I think we can file under "Delightful Surprises." 

12. When documentarian and journalist Louis Theroux admitted that he preferred his day job.

Theroux says he finds being in a prison more relaxing than being on bake off
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Everyone laughed, but it didn't seem like he was joking. 

13. When comedian Katherine Ryan highlighted how baking can also be a time for meditation.

Ryan says, they have custard in the shop but this lets me reflect on the mistakes I made in my marriage
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Nine out of ten bakers will tell you that dwelling on past failures makes for a richer and more delicious custard (the tenth is running from their problems). 

14. When actor Nicola Coughlan (of Derry Girls and Bridgerton fame) was mystified by how thoroughly her cake went awry.

Nicola realizes she's accidentally grilled her sponge
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Grilling the sponge is an unusual move, but is it also perhaps a brilliant one? (It is not. She threw it out and started again.) 

15. When comedian and musician Tim Minchin thought he wanted to be an inspiration to the youth, but discovered he couldn't be bothered.

Tim says he doesn't want kids to think he's a quitter, to which Noel points out he's lying on the floor in defeat
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It may not be inspiring, but there isn't anything more relatable to a child than making a craft project, watching it collapse, and giving in to despair until the adult in the room helps you fix it. 

16. And when he recovered just in time to deliver a timely message about both wealth inequality and the importance of being able to bullshit on the spot.

Tim describes his ruined Meringue tower as a metaphor for wealth inequality
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Making a statement is, in fact, easier than making meringue. 

17. When comedian Joe Lycett saw where his fruit turnovers were headed and made a run for it.

Joe runs from the cameraman then steals a cake from the display
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Like my professors always told me in culinary school: When in doubt, get out. (I did not go to culinary school.) 

18. When dancer Perri Kiely did a backflip after receiving a coveted Paul Hollywood handshake.

Perri gets a handshake for scones and flips for Paul
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Prue, a woman who faced biscuit labia without blinking an eye, couldn't handle Perri's daring post-scone revelry, and told him that she never wanted to see him do that again.

19. When comedian and actor Aisling Bea needed a lil' something to soothe the nerves before attempting to make muffins.

Aisling drinks and then lies about drinking
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The beer is a muffin ingredient, not an unexpected bonus, if you were wondering. 

20. When Russell got real with Paul Hollywood about the difficulties bakers have to face in their day-to-day lives.

Brand struggles to scrape batter off the side of the bowl while Hollywood laughs
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I know I'm not a natural-born baker because whenever I make box brownies I lose approximately 30% of the mix to the side of the bowl. The fact that I make box brownies is another hint. 

21. When Joe declared his love for Paul, only to be cruelly rejected.

Joe wrote "I love Paul" in icing on his plate, but he scratches that out when Paul tells him his turnovers suck
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Joe's expression of dismayed betrayal should be memorialized in a statue, or perhaps on the £5 note (sorry, Queen Elizabeth). 

22. When Aisling made a cake inspired by the LGBTQ+ community, only to worry that the final result may not be entirely welcome.

Aisling Bea saying she hopes her cake isn't so bad that the LGBTQ community wants to distance themselves, plus the messy final product
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By the way, those sticks are sparklers, so if you weren't sold on the cake before, maybe some pyrotechnics will win you over. 

23. When television personality Jamie Laing tried to make banana bread and instead delivered a "vile" gel cake.

Jamie and Paul decide the cake is the worst thing that's ever been baked in the tent
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This cake is living in 3021, but the 3021 from the darkest possible timeline. 

24. When Russell got poetic in the face of a flawed Swiss Roll.

"Look upon me, gods, and despair. For I am Ozymadias, king of sponges"
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This is, without question, the greatest use of "Ozymandias" in television history. Eat your heart out, Breaking Bad

25. When comedian and actor Jenny Eclair painted a vivid picture with both her words and her profiteroles.

Jenny describes her bake, which involves her topless on the beach in Paul's bathing suit
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For the record, I think there's only one joke made about how someone with the last name Eclair is taking part in a baking competition. 

26. When actor Siobhán McSweeney stood up for her cultural traditions when no one else would (because they were made up).

Siobhan jokes that her slime-like trifle is actually part of an Irish tradition
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When Paul heard that Siobhán used 14 sheets of gelatin in her trifle mixture, his horrified response was, "That would set the Thames!" 

27. And finally: When James kept his spirits high and his standards low during a cream horn technical challenge.

James makes one sort-of cream horn and Prue says, all I can say is that it does have the ingredients we gave you
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When Top Chef contestants describe a dish as "deconstructed," this is what I think they mean. 

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