1. If you missed the fact that The Washington Post published the full transcript of the phone call on January 28 between US president Donald Trump and Australia's prime minister Malcolm Turnbull...well, strap in because you're in for a ride.
Trump opens his call to Turnbull: "our friend Greg Norman, he is doing very well?” Turnbull: "He is a great mutual friend yes."
2. The phone call opens with Trump asking about champion Australian golfer Greg Norman.
when your friends talk behind your back but it's about how great you are
3.
TRUMP: And our friend Mel Gibson. Mel Gibson. TURNBULL: Yes. TRUMP: I thought he was American but he's Australian or something. TURNBULL: Ah
4.
Amazing conversation between Donald Trump and Turnbull leaked to the Washington Post. Just don’t know what to say.
5. The headline news has focused on the following exchange, which involves Trump seemingly learning of Australia's refugee policies for the first time.
"You're bad." "No, YOU'Reeee bAaAd 😘"
6. It's instructive that someone like Trump, known for his hardened views towards immigrants, was shocked at Australia's brutal bipartisan approach to offshore detention.
Helpful of Trump to point out Labor/Coalition refugee policy is so cruel even he couldn't fathom it.
7. Fortunately for Turnbull, the Australian public will probably lap it up.
"You are worse than I am" = endorsement of government's asylum seeker policy that will do Turnbull no harm whatsoever
8. Trump was obviously not beyond parody.
the trump turnbull transcript really is something
9.
Boy, Trump's conversation with the Prime Minister of Australia really went downhill
10. At one point, Trump says the refugees in "prison" (which is a very interesting word to use, don't you think?) aren't exactly going to "work for the local milk people".
"local milk people"
11. Say what now?
Come to my lovely western country and squeeze udders, this is how migration works
12. Who — or what — the fuck were the "local milk people"?
How good a person are you on a scale from Refugee to Works For The Local Milk People?
13.
I decided that every time I get to the office in the morning I'm going to shout "what up local milk people!"
14.
Local Milk People is what you would write on the AP Spanish test if you blanked on the word for "dairy farmers"
15.
Why do I suspect that "local milk people" didn't include any chocolate milk people?
16.
I prefer listening to the new Local Milk People album on vinyl. Love those horns on 'That I Can Tell You'.
17.
mammal think they so great with the local milk people well introduting Bird Milk. Bird Milk®©: It Is From Birds?
18.
***EXCLUSIVE*** I've obtained a leaked copy of Trump's enemies list
19.
*steps away from twitter for literally two seconds* "what the hell are local milk people"
20.
Trump calling dairy farmers "local milk people" reminds me of the time I forgot Hans Gruber's name so I referred to him as Nazi Snape.
21. But honestly, is Trump OK?
Everyone is having fun with "milk people," but for my money you can't beat this gibberish. What's wrong with your b… https://t.co/ZtlqJT7TkZ
22. Because further on, Turnbull needed to remind him of some basic geography.
Priceless. TRUMP ...that is what they said about the Boston bombers. They said they were wonderful young men. TUR… https://t.co/liVVZeuOUD
23. And yet, here we are: Trump making a solid, logical point about Australia putting refugees in offshore detention camps.
The bit where you are arguing the guys you have in jail aren't bad. So the guy you are arguing with suggests you sh… https://t.co/NXM9byPyHA
24.
Trump: we don’t want the refugees they are probably bad Turnbull: Actually? They are good. We keep them on a prison island nevertheless
25.
trump did a better critique of turnbull's refugee policy in one conversation than the labor party has in years
26. OF COURSE. OF BLOODY COURSE, KEVIN BLOODY RUDD SHOWED UP ON CNN.
CNN having no problems finding talent to talk Trump-Turnbull.
27.
Every time something happens in Australia, CNN exhumes Kevin Rudd from his cryogenic chamber deep in the bowels of NYC
28. Everyone had their favourite bit.
this is the best bit i think
29.
this is the best bit
30. Trump got it.
[seinfeld music] so what's the deal with boats?
31.
when you get it
32. This is the very real way that the phone call ended.
when a leaked transcript confirms a Prime Minister is actually an online help chat-bot
33. It was then time to decide who actually came out on top in a phone call about trading refugees.
Who came off best in the conversation about using actual human beings as bargaining chips? The winner gets the nobel peace prize.
34. The transcript left political journalists stunned.
A truly shocking conversation
35. Although, some could see the silver lining.
For all our politics can be frustrating, at least we don't have to read our president sounding like a self-centered 5yo this morning
36. Well, this is just the most silver of linings.
Imagine the alternate parallel universe where Toney is PM and we just got the transcript of his frank and fearless first chat with Trump
37. The Donald-Malcolm show rolls on, in weird and crazy fucking ways tbh.
this picture is getting so much use this year
38. The whole thing is too weird to be believed.
Pleased to see Turnbull raised this important issue