1. When the author tells you their life story before getting to the actual recipe.
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2. When they say it will take 20 minutes, but you know that shit is going to take hours.
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3. When a recipe is rated five stars except that everyone who reviewed it also put their own little twist on it.
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4. Claiming that the recipe is "easy" but you see about 47 steps when you open it.
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5. Or when they pull you in with a recipe of very few steps, but each step is insanely complicated.
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6. You pull the recipe up on your phone but your hands are all sticky from disgusting raw chicken juice so it's more trouble than it's worth.
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7. When the recipe calls for a tiny bit of something that is only available in gigantic bunches.
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8. Or when they ask you to open a whole new bottle of wine for just a tablespoon of the stuff.
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9. When a pinch of something is integral to the recipe, but you know full well that that $18 bottle of whatever will never get used again.
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10. The little *surprise* recipe at the end if there's some kind of extra thing you have to make with it.
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11. And when you work your butt off to make the perfect dish, yet it doesn't taste nearly as good as the instant stuff.
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