1.
Hot showers aren't enough, you must completely immerse yourself in boiling water.
2.
In fact, you welcome the colder months just so you can have an excuse to scald yourself.
3.
Horizontal hygiene is always better than vertical.
4.
Even though baths do come with their own set of challenges.
5.
You might get out and realize you need to give yourself a rinse in the shower anyway.
6.
But you can enjoy fun things, like eating.
7.
Or productive things, like reading.
8.
You can put on music and actually be able to hear it.
9.
Even farting is more fun.
10.
It's the only spa treatment you can give yourself for free.
11.
Not to mention bubbles are obviously the best.
12.
And you give yourself a big ol' pat on the back for not wasting water.
13.
It's a black hole you'll never want to escape from.
