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4 Delicious Recipes To Make For Your Ex-Boyfriend

You'll make him wonder why he left you!

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Stir occasionally while telling your ex-boyfriend that you probably won’t have any because "you’re really just trying to focus on your career right now and just do you." Cook 15 minutes or until golden brown.

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Tenderize the steaks with an extra large mallet while you maintain direct eye contact with your ex-boyfriend. This is an important step. Beat the meat as hard you can for one hour without averting your glare from that douchebag’s horrified face.

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Serve with wine and a fresh garden salad. Your ex-boyfriend may protest, but remember that you also protested when he spent a week with his old college girlfriend but he did it anyway.

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In a large bowl, mix the the 1 quart strawberries and 1 cup sugar until the sugar dissolves. Add 1 cup cubed rhubarb, ⅓ cup flour, and 1 tablespoon melted butter. Mix well.

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Serve to your ex-boyfriend and watch as he gags on the piping hot metal chain of a necklace. When he asks “What the hell is this?” be ready to say “You tell me, opal isn’t MY birthstone!”