A crab mousseA Caesar saladA flowerpot that fell and almost killed a diner
It's a goddamn crab mousse!
Here's a proper crab mousse, by the way.
An Oreo cakeA mozzarella and celery cakeA grasshopper pizza with corn dough
It's a grasshopper pizza.
From one of the most hipster pizza restaurants in Mexico City.
A Vietnamese sandwichRascasse cakeA work of art by Zaha Hadid
It's a bánh mì.
It's a Vietnamese sandwich, but it's been "deconstructed", so it looks like it's been plated by Miró.
Detox juiceArtisan beerA urine sample
A bar in Melbourne thought it was OK to serve it lab-style instead of IN A GODDAMN BEER MUG.
Black coffeeWine reductionChicken broth
It's a fucking black coffee.
And they only needed FIVE containers to serve it! It's certainly a step forward from the simple espresso cup.
They've been left to marinate in a shot of JägermeisterThey're part of a modern spring rollThey killed themselves because they couldn't stand this mixed-up modern life
It's a spring roll.
Although I would understand if those prawns had killed themselves.
A Bloody MaryYour typical British dish of bangers and mashA tiramisu
It's sausages and pureed potatoes.
It doesn't make sense to us either, honestly.
A dish of deconstructed bologneseElver marmitako (tuna pot)I DON'T KNOW! MY EYES HURT, I DON'T WANNA SEE ANY MORE NONSENSE.
It's a dish of deconstructed bolognese.
Which is only €29 in a French restaurant. Ugh.
Can You Tell What These Hipster Restaurant Dishes Are Meant To Be?
You'll obviously eat whatever the hipster chefs put in front of you. They're gonna con you at every fancy restaurant you go to.
They still rip you off with some bullshit-topped gourmet burger, but generally you know well where to eat without being conned. C'mon, recommend some restaurants to us.