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Sean Spicer Is A Human-Sized Wad Of Rancid Gum

He's the result of swallowing 2.5 packs a day.

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He adheres to things easily.

Spicer defends Trump's claims that millions of illegal immigrants voted in this election. There's no proof but he's sticking to it!
Congressional Quarterly / CQ-Roll Call,Inc. / Via i.huffpost.com

Spicer defends Trump's claims that millions of illegal immigrants voted in this election. There's no proof but he's sticking to it!

He's a mouthful.

When Spicer states "alternative facts" it's certainly a lot to chew on.
NBC News / Via media2.s-nbcnews.com

When Spicer states "alternative facts" it's certainly a lot to chew on.

He's harmful if swallowed.

Spicer's rhetoric is often unfounded and illogical (there's no way Trump had more inaugural attendees than Obama). His words are difficult, even impossible to digest.
Salon / Via media.salon.com

Spicer's rhetoric is often unfounded and illogical (there's no way Trump had more inaugural attendees than Obama). His words are difficult, even impossible to digest.

He loses taste after awhile.

Spicer's quick temper and aversion towards the truth threatens the First Amendment right to freedom of the press. Anger and lies lack flavor!
ABC News / Via a.abcnews.com

Spicer's quick temper and aversion towards the truth threatens the First Amendment right to freedom of the press. Anger and lies lack flavor!

He's stiff.

Spicer's wrapped state is rigged and guarded, not to mention rectangular and boxed in.
Politico / Via static2.politico.com

Spicer's wrapped state is rigged and guarded, not to mention rectangular and boxed in.

He's artificial.

Spicer is composed of conservative agendas and fabricated tales, some sorbitol too.
CNN / Via i2.cdn.turner.com

Spicer is composed of conservative agendas and fabricated tales, some sorbitol too.

He has great bubble-blowing capacity.

Spicer can take any topic and blow it out of proportion.
CNN

Spicer can take any topic and blow it out of proportion.

He's not an individual.

Sean Spicer looks and acts like most other Republican white men--enablers of racism, sexism, and a host of other bigoted acts. This Press Secretary blends in with other hate-mongers, just like a piece of cinnamon-flavored Orbit gum.
Fox News / Via citizenslant.com

Sean Spicer looks and acts like most other Republican white men--enablers of racism, sexism, and a host of other bigoted acts. This Press Secretary blends in with other hate-mongers, just like a piece of cinnamon-flavored Orbit gum.

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