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1. A coffee mug for any foul-mouthed fiend who wants a sprinkle of swears with their spoonful of sugar.
2. A foul-smelling fragrance that's sure to be a hit at your next white elephant party... despite how much this gift actually stinks.
3. A sassy shirt in a perky pink color for wardrobes with a little bite.
4. A gritty gratitude journal so you can write about how great your day was without a drop of your sarcasm going to waste.
5. A game of jizz roulette that's gonna make your (equally inappropriate friends) wanna ~cum~ over for game night, every night.
6. A tampon pouch for people who hate the ~bloody~ inconvenience of a period but still manage to embrace it with a laugh.
7. An adult coloring book you'd have to be a ~dick~ to not love coloring in.
8. An inappropriate pillow that'll be a skele-ton of fun to add to your bedding.
9. Or a sweatshirt you can wear if you have rather deadpan humor.
10. An oven mitt for people who know exactly how much they love food.
11. A festive candle that'll be a gift that's sure to ~sleigh~.
12. A graphic tee with some rather graphic life advice that's sure to help you show off your favorite life motto.
13. A bedtime story for parents whose parental block goes to bed hours before their child decides to.
14. A Big Bastard Douchebag suitcase sure to be the best thing ever when you need to carry a shit-ton of stuff.
15. An iPhone case to give someone who likes to have their phone lookin' as juicy as they do while they're swiping right all night.
16. A hand-wired ring for those moments when you wish you could give yourself the finger.
18. A cheeky chicken cookbook – it's gonna teach you several ways to ~flip the bird~ and baste it to the best of your abilities.
19. A crappy game for parents who live for potty humor.
20. A sassy mug that perfectly describes your personality before you've downed your morning coffee.
21. A drinking card game you and your friends are sure to love, even when it turns all you cool cats into asshats.
22. A picture book for people who like to picture their penis basically everywhere.
23. A gold key that has the ability to unlock the perfect comeback.
24. A T-bag teabag for anyone who thinks that poorly steeped loose leaf tastes like balls.
25. A multi-purpose dishtowel with some extra lovely language for the chef in your life who makes some frickin' delicious dishes.
26. A not-subtle-enough Christmas sweater that'll make Santa say, "Sorry ~Deer,~ you're on the naughty list."
27. A dog calendar that's sure to make even shitty days pretty days.
28. A set of three washcloths — every guest who uses these will think they're the tits.
29. A baby onesie to give new parents who know their baby's smile is gonna help them when sleepless nights have them feeling down in the ~dumps.~
30. A coffee table book that'll shock anyone who dares try and use it as a coaster.
31. A magnet pack of 72 refrigerator obscenities sure to help ignite your passion for profane poetry.
32. A game of hoopla that's gonna be a ton of fun, even if it's a lot ~harder~ than you think it should be.
33. Or a wholesome game of You've Got Crabs for close friends who love getting together and having a laugh, even when they're feeling ~crabby.~
34. A premium seasoning you can throw on any shitty dish to make it way more delicious.
35. And finally, a pair of penis or middle finger earrings (or get both and pair them together) for accessorizing with some serious statement pieces.
When your friends say your humor is too inappropriate.
Looking for more great finds? Check out some of our favorite cheap things to buy on Amazon, some of the weirdest things on Amazon you might actually want, or read through all the rest of our incredible Amazon product recommendations.
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