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    23 Inappropriate Pieces Of Home Decor I ~Swear~ You'll Want In Your Place

    Scandalous cookbooks, crude coasters, *actual* swear jars, and other inappropriate home decor your parents would probably not approve of.

    1. A welcoming statuette for folks who want to add some real personality to their garden gnome's home. 

    garden gnome bending over with pants pulled down. over the butt it says welcome.
    Amazon

    Promising review: "This little guy is on my front porch right next to the door. I love funny gnomes and he's a great addition to my collection. It's made well, sturdy, and looks great. I can't wait for my parents to come by and see it!" —banshee

    Get it from Amazon for $27.98 (available in six styles).

    2. A last nerve candle in a rather lovely amber glass jar – light this up when your boo is being a bother and you can watch them change their tune as soon as they get a whiff!  

    candle that says my last fuck and now it's on fire
    Moncioni Fragrances / Etsy

    This small candle shop is located in Austin, Texas. It has over 100 candles with quality printing and funny phrases. 

    Promising review: "This candle is great! The label printing is perfect. I love the lavender sage scent, it isn't overwhelming or chemically, just pleasant and clean. I'm glad I got the larger size, it exactly what I was looking for. I imagine the small is quite small. I'm definitely happy with my purchase." —Grace R.

    Get it from Moncioni Fragrances on Etsy for $11.99+ (available in 10 scents, two sizes, and with or without gift wrap).

    3. A coffee table book that'll shock anyone who dares try and use it as a coaster.

    cover of book
    closeup of horse nose
    Amazon

    Promising review: "This was a big hit at the white elephant gift exchange I went to. I brought it, it was fought over. I'm pretty sure bringing this book is the only reason I was invited back the following year." —Katie

    Get it from Amazon for $11.70.

    4. A dish towel sure to delight home cooks who believe in saying it like it is.

    floral dishtowel says eat up bitches
    dish towel with illustrated face holding up a slice of cheese. text says fuck, i love cheese.
    Amazon

    Promising review: "These dish towels are some of my favorite. Not only do they have fun, snarky designs but they also just keep getting softer over time. They make a great gift bag addition." —KellyT

    Get it from Amazon for $14.99 (available in 16 styles).

    5. A piece of door frame decor that'll keep your liquor cabinet safe and sound...I'm sure of it! 

    wood cut piece on doorframe designed to look like jesus with the words i saw that
    RenaGarciaShop

    Small business owner Rena has a small collection of these laugh-out-loud funny pieces, including a different image and a sticker version. 

    Promising review: "Great little surprise lurking in our guest bathroom. People always get a kick out of it! 😂" —Jamie Smith

    Get it from Rena Garcia Shop on Etsy for $20.

    6. A grapefruit or papaya print for folks who just really love, you know, fresh fruit.

    7. A coaster set – these are *definitely* gonna keep folks from getting water rings on your antique coffee table! No doubt about it! 

    Promising review: "These are durable, good quality, and funny." —Valerie Cardenas

    Get it from Amazon for $15.99.

    8. A cheeky chicken cookbook that'll look great on display in your kitchen *and* teach you several ways to ~flip the bird~ and baste it to the best of your abilities.

    cover of book
    Amazon

    This tantalizing book is filled with recipes like holy hell chicken wings, vanilla chicken, mustard-spanked chicken, and dozens of others you'd rather not describe to your mother at the dinner table.

    Promising review: "My brother-in-law has been doing a lot of cooking lately and my sister suggested I get him cooking related gifts for Christmas this year. I got him several cookbooks, this being one of them. This was a huge oversight on my part however, because I knew this book was bound to be funny (I mean come on, it's called 'Fifty Shades of Chicken' and has a chicken all tied up on the front) but I did not realize how dirty most of the jokes would be/definitely geared more towards women. But my brother-in-law loved it, including how there were half-naked men modeling with the food in the book! All of the dishes have racy names and he went through every single page laughing and saying how much he loved it. Everyone also thought that my red and embarrassed face was perfect to go along with the gift! Overall, very successful gift, but it is definitely racy and geared more towards women!" —Sarah G

    Get it from Amazon for $11.52.

    9. A neon sign basically begging to become your new, naughty, bathroom decor. 

    Promising review: "I looooove this light! It's a basic LED light. It’s super bright and you can change the brightness easily. I highly recommend this light. Perfect addition to my stream room, lol." —Fefe Duran

    Get it from Amazon for $32.99+ (available in five styles).

    10. A sassy mug that'll perfectly describe your personality before you've downed your morning coffee.

    mug that says dick with the handle a d
    Amazon

    Promising review: "The guys at the office always get a chuckle when I drink my coffee out of my ick cup! You've gotta have some fun in your work day, right? This is a great conversation piece." —mcardwell

    Get it from Amazon for $17.09+ (available in three styles).

    11. A metal sign, because last year you thought you'd try to improve your gardening skills and it didn't help much. This year your game plan is gonna be sliiightly different.

    garden with metal sign that says grow dammit
    81 Metal Art / Etsy

    This small biz is owned by Becky Wiese and located in Freeman, South Dakota.

    Promising review: "I love the sign! This is my third time purchasing it! I love giving it as a gift and this time I gave it to myself! It looks great in my garden!" —sbreshears89

    Get it from 81 Metal Art on Etsy for $33+ (available in three sizes and several colors).

    12. A sculpted light switch cover of the almighty Zeus, god of thunder and lightening, who can control your lighting with his...thing.  

    zeus light cover with person turning light on. switch is placed in center of crotch.
    Amazon

    Promising review: "This is great quality and adds an awesome, quirky detail to our bathroom. We always get funny reactions to it. I like that, despite being a funny product, it looks nice and has lots of detail. It doesn't look cheap. Easy to install!" —Manda

    Get it from Amazon for $14.95+ (available in four styles).

    13. A pair of vanity jars perfect for explaining what goes where in your bathroom. Plain and simple! 

    two jars with lids and tray. one jar says balls deep and the other says just the tip.
    Amazon

    Promising review: "When new people come over and use my bathroom I always hear them giggle when they see this. It's just one of those cute and sturdy yet funny and different pieces. Very happy." —Morgan

    Get them from Amazon for $19.99.

    14. An actual swear jar filled with some nifty wood cut helpers you can hand out when your teenagers won't stop whining and you aren't about to feed into it. 

    glass jar full of wood cut words. all say fuck.
    Amazon

    Promising review: "Funny gift to send to a good friend. Packaged well and delivered unbroken." —Amazon Customer

    Get it from Amazon for $14.99 (available in two styles).

    15. A surprisingly stunning set of genital pillows that'll be the cute and cuddly home decor you never knew you needed. 

    a cliterus, vulva, and penis pillow made with velvet
    Kokieca / Etsy

    Shop owner Paulina has filled this shop with fantastic pillows that provide helpful examples of genitals, all great for sex education. The shop also has a handful of other pieces of decor – this rug is a personal favorite of mine. 

    Promising review: "I absolutely LOVE my pillow! Quality, shipping, and service was AMAZING! Thank you Paulina for making this experience so perfect!!" —Ashley Tarver

    Get them from Kokieca on Etsy for $218.37 (available in two styles).

    16. A poppy print for anyone who loves particularly colorful wall decor. 

    poster with dripping smiley face and large print that says wanna drop acid sometime
    Groovy Creations UK / Etsy

    Illustrator and small business owner Helen runs this shop from the UK. There are over 250 different prints to check out! 

    Promising review: "This is an amazing poster, both the quality and design are excellent and the seller shipped promptly and with no issues. I would recommend to all!" —Harry Penny

    Get it from Groovy Creations UK on Etsy for $9.03+(available in five sizes and four colors).

    17. A customized cross-stitch you can proudly keep on display when your pious parents come to visit. Aww, you *finally* made them proud! 

    cross stitch with two names and a date with a floral detail. it says no longer living in sin.
    Knick Knack Corner Shop / Etsy

    To customize, send the names and dates in a message. Product will ship 10–14 days after customized details are confirmed.

    This shop is full of scandalous, funny, and dreadful cross-stitch decor. The small biz is owned by artist Teah Sitton. 

    Promising review: "I loved gettting this! Super fast speed even during the holidays, with it looking exactly like the picture. All in all great buy!!" —Maya Hansen

    Get it from Knick Knack Corner Shop on Etsy for $36+ (available in several color sets).

    18. A fancy photo featuring your very favorite thing! Convenient stores...obviously. 

    drug store photo with glowing word drugs
    Kevin Klima Photo / Etsy

    Photographer Kevin Kilma runs this small business from Chicago, Illinois.

    Promising review: "This was the highlight of our gift swap this Christmas! Can’t wait to see it hung up." —Constak

    Get it from Kevin Klima Photo on Etsy for $15+ (available in 10 sizes and two colors).

    19. A magnet pack of 72 refrigerator obscenities sure to help you ~stick~ with your passion for poetry.

    product packaging

    20. A 2023 calendar that's totally still worth getting – you'll feel totally ~crappy~ if you miss out on the rest of the months! 

    front of calendar
    Amazon

    Promising review: "This was purchased as part of a gag gift for a white elephant exchange. The lucky recipient refused to trade for a different gift so it was a success! The whole family loves dogs so the pictures were enjoyed by all." —BettySpaghetti

    Get it from Amazon for $16.99.

    21. A shaggy rug to greet you by your bed when you're dead tired at night and to wake you up to the harsh realities of the a.m. when your alarm goes off the next day. 

    colorful floor rug that says fuck
    Amazon

    Promising review: "I love it when I receive something that looks like the picture and fits the product description! This rug is super cute." —Non-compensated Reviewer

    Get it from Amazon for $25.99.

    22. A decorative pillow that's surprisingly chic for how laugh out loud funny it'll be. Go ahead, keep it in the kitchen. 

    we had sex here decorative pillow
    Asrin Co Designs / Etsy

    Samuel Moore owns this home decor and gift shop. You can find everything from cutting boards to neon signs to aprons (most with customization options available). 

    Promising review: "We purchased this to give as a gift. It’s perfect and I can't wait to give it to the recipient!" —Christina

    Get it from Asrin Co Designs on Etsy for $12.20+ (available in several colors and sizes, with or without pillow insert). 

    23. And finally, a children's picture book parents with a sense of humor are gonna love displaying in the nursery, at-the-ready for when their little bundle of sunshine doesn't believe in sleeping at night. 

    book cover
    Amazon

    Promising review: "I have given this book to over 25 people for baby showers and it is always such a hit!! Parents need to support each other and make each other laugh!! Especially when our kids are little!! This book makes you stop and laugh at yourself and not take parenting so seriously!! Love love love it!!" —Sharon L. Havers

    Get it from Amazon for $13.99.

    What you consider a true compliment regarding your home decor: