1. Justin Timberlake insists
2. My original date unfortunately had to cancel for reasons that are none of your business
3. Sadly for you, Mr. Burns is not a plausible suitor
4. Theres only a 50% chance I’ll dress like this
5. I give great gifts
6. I’ll bring you a jacket, because you somehow magically get cold when it’s sixty degrees out
7. Banana Joe
8. I won’t dance like this…
9. Or this…
10. The theme is old Hollywood, so I’ll limit myself to two Casablanca references, one Citizen Kane, and at least one Jimmy Stewart impression.
11. I have a poster of Clint Eastwood in my room so through the transitive property I’m kind of a bad ass
12. I made you a mix CD. You can have it if you say yes
I mean c’mon I at least need to have some sort of leverage here.
May the Fourth be with you… and may you be with me at Prom on May Fourth.
Since asking in person was not suffice maybe I’ll give you the URL to this in person.
And they say chivalry is dead! Just let me know your decision so I can burn the CD. Either in the technical sense or, depending on the answer, maybe in the literal sense.
P.S. Chances are I will probably need a ride. Just so we’re on the same page
- We've compiled an extensive (but not exhaustive) list of lies, exaggerations, and bullshit from Trump's first 100 days in office 💯🗒
- United Airlines has settled with the man shown being violently dragged off a plane in a video that spurred widespread outrage.
- An admitted fraudster has access to Trump through his wife's job at Mar-a-Lago — and he's tried to use it to his advantage.
- "The Real Housewives" has remained a cultural force for over a decade by reinventing itself. But has the show peaked? 👠 🔥