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28 Things That Happen When You Date A Football Fan

Never ever say: "It's just a game".

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1. When you first start dating, it's important you find out how much of a fan they really are...

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You've got to know what you're dealing with...

2. And which team they support.

Pray to the heavens it's a good team and not like... Derby County (sorry guys).
Creative Commons: Flickr: astique

Pray to the heavens it's a good team and not like... Derby County (sorry guys).

3. Even if you're not that into football, they'll want you to watch a game with them.

A Band Apart

4. And this is when you'll see their true colours.

5. Don't forget to bring appropriate materials.

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6. And you'll probably be asked to wear a shirt.

Or team colours, at the very LEAST.
BuzzFeed

Or team colours, at the very LEAST.

7. If you're really not into it, it's totally acceptable to read a book (as long as you look up during the important moments).

Warner Bros.

8. You might find yourself a bit in shock about the amount of sound your significant other produces.

Disney

There will be swearing and fist-slamming - warn the neighbours.

9. Particularly when something bad happens or the referee cocks up.

10. To make your life easier, I'd suggest simply agreeing with whatever it is they're getting worked up about...

NBC

Unless you're okay with starting a really long and boring discussion.

11. You don't have to celebrate as manically as your partner, but def take a break from eating pizza for a mini fist pump.

12. Or just go all out if you fancy it:

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Just make sure you sit back down once the game has resumed.

13. It's good to point out specific things about players, even if it makes zero sense.

As long as it's positive about their team, and negative about the opponents, they'll agree with you.
Thinkstock

As long as it's positive about their team, and negative about the opponents, they'll agree with you.

14. But try not to say anything about how attractive they are...

Lars Baron / Getty Images

15. If you're a complete football noob, you might struggle with a few things at first, like those damn team abbreviations

Sky / Via BuzzFeed

16. Or, you know, that offside rule, which you totally pretend to know.

17. You thought you'd totally had the rule covered after watching Bend It Like Beckham.

“The offside rule is when the French mustard has to be between the teriyaki sauce and the sea salt.”
Future film.

“The offside rule is when the French mustard has to be between the teriyaki sauce and the sea salt.”

18. Despite your lack of football know-how your SO will want you to come along to a game.

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And even if you don't like football, it's worth it because there's a good atmosphere and there's lots of beer.

19. Plus you get to unleash any anger you've had stored up.

Universal Studios

It looks like you're yelling: "YOU FAAAKIN WANKER!" to the referee but actually you're yelling it to your boss who refused to give you a pay rise.

20. Dating a football fan becomes slightly more tiresome when their team aren't doing so well.

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21. Or worse: their team gets RELEGATED.

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22. You also soon realise that football takes up the majority of your weekend.

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Xabi Alonso = your weekend plans, De Jong = football.

There's not just the game, there's the lead up, about 3 shows to watch before and a couple more after with all the post-match interviews and Match of the Day on Sunday.

23. Plus they'll be glued to their phone, checking their fantasy teams.

There's also the dreaded moment they realise they haven't updated their fantasy team before the deadline and run around wailing: "WHAT HAVE I DONE! SUAREZ IS MY CAPTAIN, HE'S NOT EVEN PLAYING!".
Thinkstock / Via BuzzFeed

There's also the dreaded moment they realise they haven't updated their fantasy team before the deadline and run around wailing: "WHAT HAVE I DONE! SUAREZ IS MY CAPTAIN, HE'S NOT EVEN PLAYING!".

24. But you will, slowly, start to become more of a fan, just because it's something that they feel passionate about.

25. And if people diss their team, you become bizarrely defensive.

Disney

26. And it's a tad awkward if the team they support is the one the other football fans in your life don't support.

ESPN / Via whoateallthepies.tv

Having your dad and boyfriend fight over different teams is awkward, but nothing's more awkward than Arsène Wenger trying to zip up a coat.

27. On holiday you're more than happy to find a place to watch an important game.

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Even if it's in a bit of a dive, you're happy to sacrifice a few hours of your holiday so your loved one doesn't feel anxious for missing a big game.

28. Because you know that even though they really REALLY love football, they love you more.