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16 Things All Irish Abroad Know To Be True

Bringing the craic all the time is a tough job.

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1. If you have a traditional Irish name, it will be butchered by people the world over.

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Shoutout to all my Maeves, Niamhs, Róisíns, Tadhgs, Oisíns, Caoimhes, Gearóids, Gráinnes and Aoifes out there.

2. You're most grateful for the 14 years you spent learning Irish at school when you're abroad.

Having a secret language with your BFFs in public is a real perk.
Via YouTube/Clisare

Having a secret language with your BFFs in public is a real perk.

3. You feel your nights out abroad are incomplete without Riverdance coming on at the end of the night.

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Don't these people know the night is not over until legs are flailing everywhere and no one is moving their arms?

4. ...And there is no moment comparable to a DJ abroad unexpectedly playing a 90s Irish pop banger.

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5. People cannot help but try to mimic your accent.

i will never get over louis' adorable impersonation of nialls irish accent

BBC

You're ok with it, you know it's because they think it's great. Even if they're doing a terrible job.

6. People constantly say things like "Hey! You're from Ireland, you must know Michael Kelly from Tipperary?"

ALL IRISH PEOPLE DON'T KNOW EACH OTHER. But yes, I do know Michael Kelly.
Via whenonearth.net

ALL IRISH PEOPLE DON'T KNOW EACH OTHER. But yes, I do know Michael Kelly.

7. If you're abroad to support Ireland for a sporting tournament, you know, win or lose, the Irish fans will support the hardest.

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Here we are, losing 4-0 to Spain in Euro 2012, in a roaring goodbye chorus of Fields of Athenry.

8. You're constantly having to explain your slang and phrases.

Apparently the meaning of "stall the ball, chicken, I'm ossified and need the jacks, they're like hen's teeth around here and I've been waiting donkey's" isn't immediately obvious to those from outside the Emerald Isle.
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Apparently the meaning of "stall the ball, chicken, I'm ossified and need the jacks, they're like hen's teeth around here and I've been waiting donkey's" isn't immediately obvious to those from outside the Emerald Isle.

9. Speaking of being ossified, Ireland's reputation as a boozy nation precedes you...

Your accent has landed you many a free pint.
Via memegenerator.net

Your accent has landed you many a free pint.

10. ... And you have spent many hours valiently defending your nation's honour.

"We are a land of poets, saints and scholars, not pirates and drunks!" - You, pint in hand
Via ox.ac.uk

"We are a land of poets, saints and scholars, not pirates and drunks!" - You, pint in hand

11. If you are White Irish and going somewhere sunny, you had better pack your SPF80.

White Irish people are the world's pinkest, and we've all had that one friend who got sunburned retinas on holiday.
Via thejournal.ie

White Irish people are the world's pinkest, and we've all had that one friend who got sunburned retinas on holiday.

12. You will inevitably be asked to explain Ireland's entire history every St. Patrick's Day...

Your life is basically just one really long episode of Drunk History, in which you just end up telling people to watch Michael Collins.
Warner Bros / Via IrishCentral

Your life is basically just one really long episode of Drunk History, in which you just end up telling people to watch Michael Collins.

13. ... And you smile through gritted teeth when people don't realise Ireland is its' own country.

You understand the Ireland/Northern Ireland thing is confusing, but internally scream "IT'S BEEN 100 YEARS PEOPLE, WARS WERE FOUGHT."
Via Wikipedia

You understand the Ireland/Northern Ireland thing is confusing, but internally scream "IT'S BEEN 100 YEARS PEOPLE, WARS WERE FOUGHT."

14. If you live abroad, you will spend every St. Patrick's Day listening to Irish music, traditional and new, and thinking about the old country.

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RTE

No, YOU'RE crying.

15. You've had more than your fair share of people abroad claiming to be "as Irish as you".

Via giphy

If none of your living relatives have ever been to Ireland, you are not as Irish as me. Your great-great-great uncle thrice removed's stopover in Dublin does not count.

16. Most of all, you're proud of your culture, and love nothing more than the chance to brag about the virtues Ireland to anyone who'll listen.

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