What Guy In PiLam Are You?
Congradulations, you're the next VP o' Trees. I bet your room smells real interesting. Everyone holds you to very high standards, but not as high as yours for Man City. You smoke more than a broken furnace, but will do absolutely anything for anyone. You hear a lady is studying at Wells at 3 am and in need of ice? You'll deliver it! We see that fresh Naperville style, Lil' Dicky jersey and all. Future Mr. Kelley right here folks.
This homie G consumes a dozen raw eggs in the morning, 30 nugs for lunch, and a pound of protein powder in the evening to keep the train going. Regardless of how cool you think you are, you lose. The one, the only, the true Brockmaniac demolishes any problem in his way, whether it be with willpower or brute force. In order to best manage "the risk", he took a year long solo expedition into the Sahara Desert to best understand the deepest aspects of human nature, and how they must be monitored. Many people think they are accomplished, but until you can bench 575 lbs and drive stick, you have accomplished nothing. Don't believe me? Ask Jacob.
Known as the "Hot" guy who works the center desk, every girl is falling for you. You steal kisses and hearts faster than any other man on Earth. You drive a Camero to make up for what you lack in bed, and the ladies are all about it. You have a certain charm that can make a girl fall in love in less than 30 seconds. You can often be heard saying "I miss you", and with that, the ladies feel special to you. At home you are known as the best Mexican Amishman, and you pull tips with the same charm you use to pull the ladies. You can often be found eating your next meal at the Bamboo Garden. Need to feel like you are the most important person in the world? Talk to Kevin!
Do you like chicken nuggets? Is is all you can think about? Do you often find yourself dreaming about nugs? If so, you and the Nuggster are one and the same. Nugs are life, life is nugs. You've probably gone though over 5 pounds of nugs this semester. You order nugs to be delivered to parties. You have a nug party. If anyone needs a snack, no fear, you have a pocket nug to share. Tendies, dino nugs, wings, you love them all. You probably frequent the Pilam/ASA groupme, and find it giving you all the joy you need in life. When in doubt, eat nugs.
Way to go, youre the risk and the risk manager. Dont think we dont see all those Amish roots showing through. You clearly cant decide whether youre gonna end up lying in your kitchen after a questionable night, or make sure everyone makes it back to theirs. You can handle the graduate shot, but not as well as you think you can. If youre not yelling at freshman that no, they cant come in, youre havin; a good time with the boys. When someone asks you if youre amish, you get enraged, but at the end of the night you can always be found hotboxing your buggy on the county road. Bottom line, if anyone wants free "Amish Hell" pie, youre the man they go to.
Have you ever met a sex god? Well you havent until you met Bennio. This man walks the walk and talks the talk. If youre looking for the typical Kelley Kid, well youll be dissappointed with him. Beware though, he wears camo everywhere he goes, and is rarely seen. Furthermore, this man loves stick, and I dont mean the car. Have coulrophobia? Well cya cuz this mans a clown. He's also single, ready to mingle. anf looking for a date to Pilams Dec 2 date party. Good luck ladies!
You want to be a great leader. Your way is always right no matter what, and you want to accomplish great things, so you keep yourself so busy you have to schedule in your shits. Because of your busy schedule you can always be found sleeping in class. Red Bull sponsers you on the bike team because at every race after you crash you get back up. You're the dictator of the A/C at your apartment, and you find the most joy in making memes on snapchat. You were once heard saying "I wish I could have an ego that big" and well that just about sums it up. If you have a question just ask Micah! He always has an answer.