Hello there! We're Jen, Lauren and Morgan. And here's the story about how we ended up in THIS situation:
Yes, that IS the giant nose from Double Dare. And yes, we did get to pick it.
But before we get there, let's preface this by saying we're a buncha '90s kids. Which means we lived through the end days of Double Dare with Marc Summers...
...and the thick of Double Dare 2000, with this dude. So it's safe to say we know a thing or two about DD.
And either you've heard or you haven't...but Double Dare is coming back to Nickelodeon on June 25, and we got to live out our childhood dreams by playing out a full-length episode of Double Dare. (Sadly, this one was just for fun and won't air on TV.)
We met iconic host of our youth Marc Summers who is passing the baton to new host, YouTube star Liza Koshy.
Ok now we will tell you all about the best day of our lives and give the 411 to all our fellow '90s kids on what it's like to actually be on Double Dare. Slime 'n all!
Like we said, we played a full fake episode of Double Dare. That means we had to answer trivia and compete in physical challenges before any team won (spoiler alert...we won them all!!!!!)
First was a wheelbarrow race aka the "toss-up challenge." Turns out this shit is way harder to do in your late 20s than when you're in 3rd grade...but STILL FUN.
Like we said, we won. Winning feels good, not gonna lie! This is our happy team being happy about winning :). Anyway, blah blah blah we played trivia and kept winning.
At one point we were DOUBLE DARED (DUN DUN DUN!!!!) by the other team, so we had to participate in a physical challenge. It ended up being a group one. A fun game of musical pies.
This game was simple: don't get stuck with the pie when the music stops.
OR ELSE YOU GET PIED IN THE FACE, like so.
And in case you didn't know, gettin' pied in the face is messy but also delicious! It's literally Cool Whip on a plate.
PRO TIP: the best way to clean it up is to eat it.
After a super clutch win in musical pies thanks to Damien (SUP D!!!), it was time for ~the obstacle course.~
Before the iconic obstacle course, we were given the rundown on everything. We were told that this is the part where everyone messes up and doesn't know what to do because they weren't listening to the producers explain how to do things!!! Don't blame 'em though, cause it turns out it's very hard to listen when you're staring at the world famous giant nose!!!!!!!
The other team went first, so we got to see where they went wrong and NOT DO THAT. Then we were up.
Morgan started things off by making a smooth entrance into the wringer.
After passing the flag off to Jen, Jen ran right into that mouth and slid down in a 10/10 fashion.
After the sucessful flag handoff, Lauren dug deep into the big nose.
SIDENOTE: The nose is big, and the flag is really far up there. However it's not just shoved up in some gooey snot like you might think, it's literally just velcro-d to the inside of the nose wall. Took a minute to realize that and for a short time I thought I might never find the flag.
BUT THEN THE FLAG was found, and passed on to Damien, who took on the human hamster wheel.
BTW, that thing is harder than it looks, but guess what...it didn't matter, because we finished with time to spare and beat out the other team by SEVERAL SECONDS. Morgan retrieved our winning flag.
AND if you're wondering what it looks like the moment you win Double Dare...this is it!!!
After a big win like that, turns out there's only one prize: get slimed. Yet another dream come true!
We were placed in baby pools filled with slime for our feet. It's extremely slippery, which is why Jen felt the need to hang onto Lauren.
AND THEN THE CEREMONIAL SLIMING HAPPENED.
Here's everything you need to know about slime:
1) It's cold
2) It's messy
3) It tastes like applesauce and vanilla pudding
4) It's sticky
5) It will get everywhere...and we mean EV-ER-Y-WHERE
6) You will be cleaning it out of your hair and ears for days.
7) ALL OF THAT IS TOTALLY AND COMPLETELY FUCKING WORTH IT.
After all of this, the only thing left to do was go home and shower. So we did as the New Yorkers do, and took the subway in Double Dare gear, whilst slimed as heck!
Anyway, we're tired just reliving the magical day so here are our final thoughts:
Morgan: It was seriously worth every second of the two extra showers I had to take that day. I waited 27 years to get slimed and although I could've done without it going in my hair, nothing compares to feeling and tasting that goo for the first time. I want to tell my future kids about this moment, hell I might even make them put it on my tombstone! Viva la Slime!
Jen: I suddenly have so much respect for the kids I made fun of FOR YEARS. And, I can still hardly believe I actually got slimed!!! It was a dream a 28 years in the making, and it went by in the blink of an eye.
Lauren: I sent a BCC'd email to everyone in my contacts with a picture of me picking the giant nose. I will never forget that day, so I didn't want anyone else to either!!! A dream come true! A fantasy come to life! One of the happiest days I'll ever experience!!!! Still haven't washed those clothes though. I really need to do that.