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As If Shit Isn't Bad Enough Already, Now Cellino & Barnes Injury Attorneys Hate Each Other

Cellino & Barnes? More like Cellino VS Barnes.

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Friends, family, and everyone else that I've yet to meet but love the same. We are living in tough times. Bees are dying at an alarming rate and in general things are really shit. I didn't think things could get worse, but then yesterday this happened:

That's right.

Injury attorney Steve Barnes...

...is seeking a restraining order against fellow injury attorney Ross Cellino.

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Now, you might remember that only about two months ago we found out that Cellino was suing Barnes. To quote Tegan and Sara, it was a shock to our system. Here's a legal document that I don't totally understand but it says Cellino VS Barnes, which is troublesome.

I mean, Cellino & Barnes have been injury attorneys together forever.

Literally since Cellino had brown hair and Barnes had well, like one centimeter more hair.

Sharon Cantillon / BN

And now not only is Cellino suing Barnes, but Barnes literally doesn't want Cellino within 100 feet of him.

This is as close as they'll ever be again.
yelp.com

This is as close as they'll ever be again.

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Since I'm invested in Cellino & Barnes and consider them like second and third father figures, I am left confused and sad. I've been trusting them for over 50 years. What the heck happened?? Well upon further (but brief) investigation, Barnes is accusing Cellino of "reprehensible conduct." Idk what that means tbh, but it sounds... reprehensible.

But what started it?!?! Ater some more very very brief investigating, I found out that Cellino's father actually started the law firm, and throughout the years it has been called many different things (honestly who the fuck is Dwyer?!) It doesn't matter, because Cellino & Barnes is obviously most iconic.

Either way I guess Cellino is claimin' the firm for himself because it was "Cellino & ______" through the ages and that's causing tension because Barnes is like, waittttt a minute. Idk, I'm not a lawyer.

It could also possibly be that Barnes is just pissed that his name has been second this whole time. As a twin who was referenced as Alex & Lauren for my entire life, I understand that plight. However this is speculation and I strike it from the record.

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Either way, Cellino & Barnes hate each other. AND IDK WHO TO CALL FOR AN INJURY ATTORNEY ANYMORE.

But I guess no matter what happens, we'll always have the jingle.

View this video on YouTube

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RIP everything.