10. Amy Lee It’s like Beverly Craven fell into a goth clothes shop and decided to join a metal band for a lark. Her voice is so “serious face”. 9. Ian Broudie
In at Number Nine, it’s as if boring old Paul “from accounts” was drafted in last minute to take the mic when the real singer was busy. But then the real singer never returned and Paul stayed. 8. Heather Small A big, over-ripe orange of a voice. Every word sung as if she’s doing a funny voice. But she’s not, it’s just her voice. Very strange. 7. Billy Corgan Sings like he’s a perverted nuisance caller trying to blow out several birthday cake candles. 6. Mark Knopfler Sounds like Jeremy Clarkson on local anaesthetic. WAKE THE HELL UP! The soundtrack to many childhood car journeys and we weren’t desperately screaming :”ARE WE THERE YET?” because we were impatient children, if you catch my drift. 5. Duffy Imagine if Lulu was forced into a very tiny bottle of Aqua Libra after inhaling two ‘Barbie Princess’ helium balloons. 4. Starsailor’s James Walsh He’s going to burst into tears! No he’s not. Oh wait…he is now! Is he? Hang on…Now! Yes! Oh maybe not yet…Wait…etc, etc. 3. The Offspring’s Dexter Holland 2. Michael Jackson As a child and early in his career, MJ sounded full of the joys of youth. As he got older however, his voice veered between an aural tourettes factory that was full of crazy tics, whoops and “scared boy-man slowly walking down the stairs with the lights off”. 1. Bob Dylan
My absolute worst. If the vacuum cleaner from The Teletubbies (NooNoo to you and me) had respiratory failure, he’d sound like this. Obviously he didn’t always wheeze through his songs, but the latter half of his career has seen that froggy voice over shadowing everything. 9. Ian Broudie
In at Number Nine, it’s as if boring old Paul “from accounts” was drafted in last minute to take the mic when the real singer was busy. But then the real singer never returned and Paul stayed.
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