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    24 Brilliant Things That Happened To Everyone At A British Primary School

    Figuring out the perfect bit of clip art was so important.

    1. Finding out the teacher's first name and using that information to lord it over everyone.

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    It's now unclear as to why this information held so much power.

    2. Peeling off a really, really massive bit of PVA glue after you covered your hands in it.

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    If it was really big, you could save it.

    3. Finding out that the answers to all the questions were all in the back of the textbooks.

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    Eventually, it was just the first thing you ever checked when you got a textbook.

    4. When your handwriting pen ran out so you got a brand new one, and it just worked so smoothly.

    5. Figuring out that you could bring sweets from home into school and sell them, and make money.

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    All those 20p coins added up.

    6. Getting to go into the staff room.

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    Turned out it was a pretty normal room.

    7. Coming in with LOADS of Tesco Computers for Schools vouchers.

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    Not that there ever seemed to be new computers anywhere in the school.

    8. Getting given an award in assembly and then carefully stepping over everyone on the way to the front.

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    "Oh, hey, no, don't mind me, just being AWESOME over here."

    9. Being considered responsible enough to use the overhead projector.

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    A legitimate thing to go on your CV, really.

    10. Returning with the ball after someone had kicked it over the wall.

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    Especially if someone else had already tried to find it, and failed.

    11. Getting to leave in the middle of the day because you had a dentist appointment, while everyone else just glared at you.

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    There was school happening, and you weren't there. Best.

    12. When whoever was running the school play gave you the lead, and you assumed it meant you were days away from becoming a world-famous actor.

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    Didn't happen. Probably.

    13. Getting a 25 metre badge in swimming and looking forward to going to the Olympics.

    14. Your class being the first to go to the book fair.

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    "Hey, bitches, how does getting sloppy seconds feel?"

    15. Taking a fiver on a school trip instead of the £2 the letter said.

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    "Yes, I will buy an extra packet of wine gums. COME AT ME."

    16. Then going past your house on the coach and suddenly becoming a minor celebrity.

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    It's not clear why geographic happenstance was so important.

    17. Picking the perfect WordArt.

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    This skill had limited real-life application.

    18. Getting your school to actually appear on 50/50.

    It never happened though, because obviously. Would have been mega though.

    19. Someone else forgetting non-uniform day.

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    But if you forgot it, it would be one of the worst days of your life.

    20. The teacher actually letting you watch a video.

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    Let's be honest, it's now clear that the teacher was just hungover.

    21. Seeing your teacher out in the real world like they actually had a life.

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    22. Helping put the chairs on the desks at the end of the day and feeling more responsible than you ever will again.

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    Again, should be permissible on a CV.

    23. Actually reaching Year 6, and getting to sit on the benches and look over the rest of assembly like a conquerer.

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    Of course, the benches are so small that you could barely bend down to sit on them now.

    24. A dog appearing in the playground and everyone having the absolute best day of their lives.

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    Everyone just went apeshit. It was a fucking dog in the playground.

    Partially inspired by @PrimarySklProbs

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