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17 Phrases All Gay Men LOOOOOVE To Hear

Really, the more often, the better.

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1. "You don't look gay."

Ahhhh, sorry! I forgot my magical tiara at home.
Columbia Pictures

Ahhhh, sorry! I forgot my magical tiara at home.

2. "But you're not effeminate at all."

I guess I missed the lesson where they taught us that all gay men HAVE to be effeminate. I suppose I also missed the one where they said there's something wrong with that.
Universal Pictures

I guess I missed the lesson where they taught us that all gay men HAVE to be effeminate. I suppose I also missed the one where they said there's something wrong with that.

3. "So, do you dress like a woman?"

Fox

How did you know?! Because I'm a man who likes other men, I must automatically have a passionate desire to wear bralettes, right? As far as I know, what you wear has nothing to do with your sexual preferences.

4. "Who's the man and who's the woman?"

giphy.com

Well, last time I checked, he was a man...and so was I.

5. "Are you gay, or do you just wish you were a woman?"

Actually, I always wanted to be a unicorn dolphin.
ABC

Actually, I always wanted to be a unicorn dolphin.

6. "When did you become gay?"

giphy

One day I fell down the stairs and hit my head and BOOM! Gay.

7. "I'll make you a man."

WAIT, I'M NOT A MAN?! WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN?!
Fuji TV

WAIT, I'M NOT A MAN?! WHEN DID THAT HAPPEN?!

8. "What a waste."

... Thanks?
NBC

... Thanks?

9. "I've always said 'gay.' I don't mean it as a slur. It means the same thing as 'lame' when I say it."

Fox

OH! Thank goodness. Thanks for clarifying.

10. "I'm open-minded! I have no problem with it. All cool with gays..."

giphy.com

The world needs more heroes like you. You've ended prejudice.

11. "...as long as you don't try to hit on me."

QUICK, COVER YOUR FACE! I'd hate to fall into hetero temptation.
Twitter: @xo_ynel

QUICK, COVER YOUR FACE! I'd hate to fall into hetero temptation.

12. "You must love Lady Gaga/Britney/Beyoncé/Madonna."

Actually, yes! When you come out of the closet, you're automatically enrolled in their fan clubs, and you get a free rainbow thong.
MTV

Actually, yes! When you come out of the closet, you're automatically enrolled in their fan clubs, and you get a free rainbow thong.

13. "I know another gay dude I could hook you up with."

giphy.com

Everyone knows that when two gay men lock eyes, they immediately fall in love.

14. "Were you abused as a child?"

You would NEVER ask someone you just met that question! Why do you think it's okay to ask me that just because I'm gay?
Warner Pictures

You would NEVER ask someone you just met that question! Why do you think it's okay to ask me that just because I'm gay?

15. "Does everyone at your office know? I know not everyone is so accepting of it."

Warner Bros.

I'm like Batman. Nobody at work knows my secret identity.

16. "Should I use female pronouns around you?"

perritasgif.tumblr.com

Of course, girl! Gays won't understand if you speak normally.

17. "I'm sure it's just a phase."

American Greetings

A phase that's lasted longer than the Jurassic period, the Crusades, and the Cold War combined.

This post was translated from Spanish.

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