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35 Things You'll Only Understand If You're From South-East Essex

Anywhere near Basildon, Southend, or Thurrock? You'll know what I'm talking about.

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16. Summer uniform rules are very stringent. Failure to adhere will result in being lame.


Snapback, Aviators, Tan, Tight Polo T-Shirt, Tailored Pastel Shorts, Shiny Legs, No Socks, Boxfresh Shoes, and a Lager. Do not under any circumstances leave the house without your tiny manbag.

33. "We 'ad a propa sick sesh bombin' it daan the A13 . Yeh I am bare buzzin' bruv, fort it was gonna be bleak. I dun'arf wanna get gattered though innit.... You out t'night fella? Let's get ON IT. Nice one bruv, bell me later."