If you want to be discreet,
You can drink it from your seat.
When you want to drink outside,
Take your wine out for a ride.
For some wine on the green,
Here’s how you won’t be seen.
If you’re feeling extra sly,
You can store it on your thigh.
Binoculars might help your sight,
But “Barnoculars” come with a bite.
Take a bottle on the go,
Hidden where no one will know.
But if you want to go all out,
This handbag comes with a spout.
If wine’s your number one provision,
This might be the best decision.
But if you want an ample bust,
This brassiere is a must.
And for the classiest affair,
Don’t forget your fine glassware.
- Top legal scholars will be filing the 1st major lawsuit against President Trump's alleged business conflicts on Monday.
- "Welcome to the movement": Women's March on Washington organizers are working tirelessly to make sure 1st-time marchers stick around ✊
- Kellyanne Conway says White House press sec. Sean Spicer didn't lie about crowd size at Trump's inauguration. He gave "alternative facts."
- The Patriots are heading to the Super Bowl yet again after crushing the Steelers. They'll play the Falcons on Feb. 5 🏈