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Moving Home After College: Expectation Vs. Reality

It's all a bunch of fun and games until graduation.

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Reality: "We love having you here, just not all the time."

Paramount Pictures / SNL Studios / Via

I wish I was joking when I say my Mom actually said this to me on my very first night home. Turns out they do love us very much, but from afar....

Expectation: Find a spectacular summer job because I'm educated.

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Of course, I'm still looking for a full-time real job (*cough,cough* Here's my LinkedIn), but in the meantime I need to make some extra cash. I just graduated from a top university, this shouldn't be very hard, right?


Reality: I can't workout there, I'll see people I know.

Showtime / Via

Apparently there is no better place to catch up on someone's entire life story than when you're covered in sweat, out-of-breath, and dying on your elliptical.


Reality: Everyone either has a real job, a temp job, a vacation, an internship, or basically isn't coming home ever again.

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Will everyone come home please? Or just stop working 9-5 already? That'd be great. Thanks.

Reality: What other experiences could you possibly need from me?

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I'm officially starting a protest against any job requiring 10-20 years of experience from being called "entry-level". I went to college and did countless internships, what else do I have to experience for you people? Then you start being labeled as "over-qualified" and everything is completely downhill from there.


Reality: I feel like a stranger in my own home.

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While living in your own apartment you buy all the things you like and know where to find everything. Now I'm home and spent all afternoon looking for a chicken breast to cook (which I never found), cilantro to season with (which I never found), my handy sponge-on-a-soap-stick to clean with (which we don't own), and I found out we don't have ANY WINE! WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?


Reality: "Is it getting hot in here? I can't breathe. I DON'T KNOW WHERE MY LIFE IS GOING."

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I'm actually getting fairly skilled at realizing when a panic attack may creep up on me and have learned to just start thinking of something else short term. Mostly food. "I really wonder what I'm going to do with my life....buuuuut not as much as I wonder what I'm having for dinner!"

Reality: I spend all day doing exactly this....while trying desperately to find a job and get out of my parent's house.

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Technically I've only been home from college for two full days, but I don't see this lifestyle changing anytime soon. Give or take the constant job hunting, the daily article writing, and the desire to move out ASAP. This is paradise?

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