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8 Subtle Red Flags Your Date Is Secretly A Jerk

Sneaky sneaky.

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1. They put their phone on the table.

This could POSSIBLY be OK if they explain that they are an ER doctor on call or that if they miss a certain bizarre phone call a puppy will die, but other than that, there is no need for that phone to be on the table during your date.
Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed

This could POSSIBLY be OK if they explain that they are an ER doctor on call or that if they miss a certain bizarre phone call a puppy will die, but other than that, there is no need for that phone to be on the table during your date.

2. They're rude to the waiter.

This probably won't be as straight forward as flicking them off, like in the picture above. But if they aren't saying "please" or "thank you" or are just being generally unkind to the waiter, you can bet they aren't going to be kind to you for very long either.
Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed

This probably won't be as straight forward as flicking them off, like in the picture above. But if they aren't saying "please" or "thank you" or are just being generally unkind to the waiter, you can bet they aren't going to be kind to you for very long either.

3. They don't ask any questions about you or relay questions back to your questions.

You didn't go on a date to interview someone for a position in your pants, you went on a date to interview each other for positions in each other's pants.
Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed

You didn't go on a date to interview someone for a position in your pants, you went on a date to interview each other for positions in each other's pants.

4. Furthermore, instead of actually listening when you speak they only look like they're waiting to respond with something they want to say about themselves.

Don't get me wrong being excited to talk in a conversation is great, but if they're talking over you to just talk obsessively about themselves they probably won't make a very thoughtful partner in the long run.
Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed

Don't get me wrong being excited to talk in a conversation is great, but if they're talking over you to just talk obsessively about themselves they probably won't make a very thoughtful partner in the long run.

5. They talk about their ex in a bad way.

Who knows their ex may be cool, or they may actually be the worst, but either way now is not the time to talk about it. They have more important things to focus on, like being on a date with your fine ass.
Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed

Who knows their ex may be cool, or they may actually be the worst, but either way now is not the time to talk about it. They have more important things to focus on, like being on a date with your fine ass.

6. They can't stop looking at their phone (with no excuse).

Again, MAYBE, if at the very beginning of the date they explained that a puppy will die if they miss a call this kind of behavior COULD MAYBE slide. But most likely that's not the case and they're just being rude-pants.
Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed

Again, MAYBE, if at the very beginning of the date they explained that a puppy will die if they miss a call this kind of behavior COULD MAYBE slide. But most likely that's not the case and they're just being rude-pants.

7. Almost everything they say is negative.

Now don't get me wrong, negativity can be totally normal and healthy. But, if pretty much everything they say is negative, it's going to be a long hard road to get them to enjoy anything (including you).
Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed

Now don't get me wrong, negativity can be totally normal and healthy. But, if pretty much everything they say is negative, it's going to be a long hard road to get them to enjoy anything (including you).

8. You can't put your finger on exactly why you just sense they're secretly a jerk.

Jerkiness can be very subtle, if your gut is telling you your date is a jerk but you can't put your finger on exactly why - there's probably reason. For example maybe they called your job "cute" and it seemed a little condescending or they just seem disinterested. Whatever the reasoning don't force it by going on so many dates with them you get confused by feelings of attachment. Your first instincts after one to three dates are usually right.
Loryn Brantz / BuzzFeed

Jerkiness can be very subtle, if your gut is telling you your date is a jerk but you can't put your finger on exactly why - there's probably reason. For example maybe they called your job "cute" and it seemed a little condescending or they just seem disinterested. Whatever the reasoning don't force it by going on so many dates with them you get confused by feelings of attachment. Your first instincts after one to three dates are usually right.

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