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I Went To A Cat Cafe For The First Time And It Was Not What I Expected

I decided to visit some of the sights the beautiful country of Singapore has to offer, so I went to a cat cafe. Because when in Singapore... go to a cat cafe? Warning: this post contains adorable sleeping cats.

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My experience started as most things do these days: on the internet. After an extensive search (I googled cat cafes Singapore and the area I was in), I found a cat cafe that didn't close until 11pm, which seemed like a prime time to visit some cats stuck in a room.

I got to the mall where the cat cafe was located, and it looked like what I imagine Asia on steroids would looked like. I pushed through the various comic book shops and made my way to the cafe.

As soon as I entered Cuddles Cat Cafe, the nature of my impending spinsterhood loomed on me. I'm pretty sure going to a cat cafe alone is the first step to being single for the rest of your life with 50 cats. Just sayin.

After taking my shoes off, I left my belongings and my dignity at the door, and stepped into a room full of all things cats. Except this wall. This wall had fish on it for some reason, maybe to tease the cats of a life in the caribbean they can never have?

The caribbean themed wall.

The caribbean themed wall.

Having never been in a cat cafe before, I had no idea how it worked: do I approach them? Do I wait for them to approach me?

It was just like dating all over again, except with cats.

Did I mention it was eerily quiet in the cafe? They enforced "library like quietness" in the cafe, which seemed weird to me because who has coffee or a meal in absolute silence? Oh well, it wasn't like I had anybody to talk to anyway.

I looked at the menu, hoping to find alcohol. There was none. Apparently alcohol and cats do not mix.

I thought alcohol and cats was how every Taylor Swift song is written!?

My life is a lie.

So after coming to terms with the fact that I'd have to do this sober, I decided to embrace my spinster status and go looking for a cat.

Too bad none of them wanted anything to do with me, running away as soon as I'd approach, which left me feeling dejected because if cats didn't even want me, then who would?!

This was all while I chased cats in the cafe, alone. People were definitely pitying me.

Although the employee who was hired I'm guess to stand around and make sure no one abuses the cats, like some sort of Madame in a brothel (she was also wearing a kimono for some reason?), definitely had her eye on me as if I was gonna take a cat and bolt.

Girl have you seen how these cats reject me!?

Finally, I gave up and resigned myself to the sleeping cats, who couldn't care less if I was there, but didn't run away either, which was a massive step up from me being rejected by cats. It still hurts when I think about it.

Here's one of those sleeping cats I made a one-sided friendship with.

Here's another one because, cuteness. Note the employee who was casually looking around but secretly thought I was going to kit-nap all her cats. I'm too funny, I know.

Here's another one because, cuteness.

Note the employee who was casually looking around but secretly thought I was going to kit-nap all her cats. I'm too funny, I know.

Eventually I decided the only cats I was going to get close to were the blown up photos of cuddles cafe residents as seen above.I sat down on one of those bean bags pretending to message someone on my phone, but secretly watched grown adults chase after cats for a selfie. Finally, I decided I had sufficiently placated my lonely cat lady persona, and decided to leave my furry friends behind in search of some less-humiliating form of entertainment (and alcohol).I do have to note though, this experience has given me a greater appreciation for T Swift. You go girl, I get you. As I left Cuddles Cat Cafe cuddle-free (see what I did there), I contemplated how much alcohol I would need to forget this experience. The answer is: too much.

Eventually I decided the only cats I was going to get close to were the blown up photos of cuddles cafe residents as seen above.

I sat down on one of those bean bags pretending to message someone on my phone, but secretly watched grown adults chase after cats for a selfie.

Finally, I decided I had sufficiently placated my lonely cat lady persona, and decided to leave my furry friends behind in search of some less-humiliating form of entertainment (and alcohol).

I do have to note though, this experience has given me a greater appreciation for T Swift. You go girl, I get you.

As I left Cuddles Cat Cafe cuddle-free (see what I did there), I contemplated how much alcohol I would need to forget this experience. The answer is: too much.

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