10 Footballers Who Recorded Singles (And Really Shouldn’t Have Done)

Because sometimes being a professional footballer just isn’t quite enough.

1. Ian Wright: “Do The Right Thing”.

Confusingly, Wright quit the BBC after claiming he was made to look like a “comedy jester.”

2. Andy Cole: “Outstanding”.

Match of the Day pundit Mark Lawrenson’s review: “It’s absolute toilet.”

3. Vinnie Jones: “Big Bad Leroy Brown”.

Mediocre footballer, bad actor, dreadful singer.

4. Clint Dempsey: “Don’t Tread”.

Hoodies for goalposts (it’s actually pretty good).

5. Johan Cruyff: “Oei, Oei, Oei Dat Was Me Weer Een Loei”.

Sure, there’s no better song by a Dutch footballing superstar.

6. Ruud Gullit: “Not the Dancing Kind”.

Oh, fair enough.

7. Paul Gascoigne: “Fog on the Tyne”.

Features the lyric, “Sittin’ in a sleazy snack bar sucking sickly sausage rolls.”

8. Franz Beckenbauer: “Gute Freunde Kann Niemand Trennen”.

Accompanied by the world’s least enthusiastic backing singers.

9. Kevin Keegan: “Head Over Heels in Love”.

Only the second best song by a former England manager.

10. Hoddle and Waddle: “Diamond Lights”.

“Hey, Chris. Have you ever noticed how our surnames rhyme?”

“I have, Glen. Let’s release a single together.”

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