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100 Thoughts I Had Watching The Orange Is The New Black Season 5 Premiere

"It's like a party. Except terrifying." Spoilers obvi.

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1. THESE CREDITS. They get me every time. I could watch this for 50 whole minutes

3. Piper and Alex running away=smartest decision they’ve made ever???

4. “Shit I got hit with the casing am I bleeding?” LOL already

5. Daya doesn't speak Spanish duh. What show have you been watching Humps

9. These two assholes drinking soda just chilling. I hate everyone.

10. This girl whose name I forgot hiding under her bed is actually sad af.

13. Maritza’s “riiiiight??” while she’s kicking the guard is A++++ LOL again

18. That girl in the background is straight just wearing a bra??? Okay

21. “Not your strongest but good effort”. These two have come so far

22. God this show is funny. “You think I’m starting a lock collection?”

31. “Where are we gonna find a lemon?!” These one liners. Here for the one liners

37. Props to this show for keeping my attention with so many characters and also not annoying me with this blaring alarm in the background

40. Why is Caputo just CHILLING while the alarm is going off????? Does no one realize this is real

46. I fully expected her to hit her while she was talking. Disappointing

48. Just realized this episode is called Riot FOMO. And very accurate, this looks fun

49. Piper I see you but now is not the time for fooling around. A RIOT IS OCCURRING

50. Oh. The other guards think it’s a guard on a shooting spree

53. Yeah, i’m okay with the asshole guards taking down the nazis (or one of them prefers White nationalist??? but, SAME SAME)

55. Oh girl that was something with putting her period blood on her face, but again I say PRAISE GIRLS GETTING SHIT DONE ONLY THEY CAN DO

60. You’re seriously concerned with the fact that she stole a jar of peanut butter when THERE ARE MORE SERIOUS CONCERNS HELLO

62. “It’s like a party except terrifying” PERFECT DESCRIPTION

67. Daya realizing she could be going to Max is very heartbreaking

75. Hahaha they found the prissy white lady. (Do we know her? I cannot remember)

79. Talk of a riot? WHAT’S IT LOOK LIKE THIS MAN’S BEEN SHOT

80. “I was a fireman. Firefighter.” Just needed to acknowledge this line.

81. I love that everyone is collecting hostages this is awesome

82. “They represent the patriarchy and the oppression of women and they hurt like fuck” PREACH girl

83. Taystee and crew don’t know where to post the video loooool

97. I LOVE NETFLIX GIVING ME ALL THE EPISODES AT ONCE I LIVE FOR BINGE WATCHING SHOWS

99. Though in all seriousness, this was a bomb episode and I miss Poussey

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